


Living Like We're Renegades

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe- Modern Setting - Freeform, Alternate Universe- non magic, Bigotry, Bullying, Cochlear Implants, Deaf Character, Deaf Remus, F/M, Genderfluid Sirius, Homophobia, M/M, Slurs, Transphobia, Violence, cheerleader Sirius, cheerleading, gender studies, transphobic language, university fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-10
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-04-30 22:06:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5181413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exuberant, proud, genderfluid, cheerleader, self-described narcissist.  All things to describe Sirius Black.  It's a stark contrast from the self-imposed loner, Journalist, and Gender Studies major Remus Lupin who is thrown into Sirius' world after accepting a project for a class.  When the two worlds collide, both lives are changed for the better. </p><p> <i>Sirius leant forward a bit, meeting Remus’ eyes.  “Are you asking if I go for cute boys in beanies and jumpers, Remus Lupin?”</i></p><p> <i>Remus’ face went hot.  “Er.  No.  I mean…er…”</i></p><p> <i>Sirius laughed.  “Find your chill, love.  I’m joking.”  He winked at Remus and sat back again.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay handful of notes. One- This was written for the anon tumblr prompt- Hey! Random prompt, ignore it if you like (ik it's weird) but wolfstar college au with flamboyant (possibly gender queer) Sirius as a cheerleader? (NOT necessarily skirt+pompoms; guys cheer too) with Remus doing journalism or gender studies to link.
> 
> Two- Remus having a CI in this story is not pro CI. I'm not Deaf (but my near entire family is) and I am not pro CI. However having worked as a teacher for Deaf students for the last 7 years I have a lot of experience with people who were given them. Remus would have gotten his in the early to mid nineties based on his age in this fic, and the process then was more invasive than it is today. Meaning the surgery would have destroyed what little natural hearing he had on that side. just a bit of a preachy-note here, I feel it's extremely important for hearing parents to learn sign, to teach their children sign, and to expose them to the Deaf community very early on. Even if they're verbal. However there are MANY people like Remus in this fic who weren't given the opportunity because their hearing parents didn't understand it. Okay done being preachy.
> 
> Three- Sirius identifies as Genderfluid, but uses he/him pronouns. That does not negate his identity as genderfluid, even when he's identifying as a woman. I am not genderfluid, but I have spent a lot of time in the past week listening to people who are talk about their experiences. It's very important to remember gender and pronouns are defined by the individual, and anything they choose should always and 100% be respected.
> 
> Four- there will be some phobic issues in this fic, so please be aware of that as you read. There are three characters who are dreadful, and in the next chapter there will be an issue of bullying/violence directed at an LGBT+ character. I will NOT go into graphic detail. It will be mostly the aftermath shown and there will be a lot of care provided. However it can be triggering so please please take care if this triggers you.
> 
> Five- I didn't plan for this to go multiple chapters, but it has, I'm afraid. Three at the most, but it might only be two. Either way, it should be finished quickly.
> 
> Six-and last-- I don't know anything about cheerleading. All my information is based on what I've found on google. But I'm trying to keep it as authentic as I can manage.

“SIRIUS BLACK YOU STUPID FUCK!” 

Now, this was not the first time Sirius had been woken in such a manner. And cracking an eye open, he saw Lily standing in his door way holding up a rather fetching crop-top. Pulling the duvet from the bottom of his face, Sirius sat up and let out a small cough. “Good morning, Lils.”

“I’m going to kill you. I’m going to kill you dead. What the bloody fuck have you done?”

He blinked, then realised what she was talking about. “Oh!” Flopping back down to his pillow, he mustered his most charming grin. “Trust me, love. It looks better that way.”

“This cost me seventy fucking quid. Seventy of my hard-earned quid. If I wanted a fucking crop top, you fucking wanker, I would have bought one!”

Letting out a sigh, Sirius rolled onto his stomach and ran a hand through his long, mussed hair. “Lily, my love, my sweet little blossom…”

“No. You owe me a fucking proper shirt, Sirius. I’m not even joking.” With that, she slammed his door and stormed out.

Letting out a groan, Sirius peered at the clock on his nightstand and saw it had just gone eight. Rarely did he pull himself out of bed before eleven, unless he had practise or lectures—which he had none of on a Sunday. But he was awake now, thanks to his best mate’s upset girlfriend—and really why she was so upset was beyond him, the shirt looked better as a crop top—so he might as well drag himself out and have a run.

With a groan, he contemplating seeking revenge on her for disturbing his beauty rest, but perhaps he _had_ gone a bit far with altering her clothes without asking. But really, it was up to him to make sure everyone looked their best. It wasn’t his fault if they couldn’t shop properly.

Yawning loudly, Sirius trudged to his wardrobe, scouring through the mess to find jogging bottoms and a tank top. He slipped them on over his pants, then grabbed a tie from his vanity table and used his fingers to scoop his hair into a messy bun. 

The reflection staring back at him said he’d got a bit too pissed the night before—if his red eyes were any indication—and he’d have to shave as he was not in the mood to sport a five o’clock shadow. He used the heels of his palms to scrub sleep from his grey eyes, and yawned again.

He could hear people in the flat moving about now. It was a nice place, a private flat with five bedrooms, three occupied by himself, Lily and James, and Peter. The other two had been set up for gaming and parties. James’ ridiculously rich parents—who lived between London and Mumbai—owned the building. It was a rather good deal being University students.

It also helped as Sirius had been recently disinherited from his family. His father had been a high profile politician who married a woman on a trip to Thailand. She was a good fit for him, it was decided. She wasted no time becoming a sharp, fierce matriarch of his family who tolerated no nonsense from both him and his brother.

Sirius, of course, refused to bend to her whims and was unceremoniously thrown out of his house at sixteen. The Potters, who had always been a far kinder and gentler family, had taken him in immediately.

Things had been tense with Sirius and Regulus for years, but now that his father had passed and his mother was getting on in her years, they were repairing a strained, but more friendly relationship. And Regulus might have spent most of his childhood attached to his mother’s skirts, but he was far more understanding than Sirius had given him credit for. When Sirius sat him down upon reconciliation and told him he was a pansexual, genderqueer cheerleader for the KCL Hippogriffs, Regulus had taken it all in stride.

“You’ll probably end up in hell,” he said with the sort of lazy, graceful elegance the Blacks were famous for, “but that’s your problem. Not mine.”

“You should come and see me perform,” Sirius suggested.

Regulus snorted. “I’ve been watching you perform your entire life, you fucking drama queen. But I’ll think about it.”

So far Regulus had not come to a game or competition, but they texted from time to time, and that was enough. Besides, Sirius had built this fragile, fiercely loved family he lived with now. James was his brother, Lily his best friend, and Peter a fiercely loyal member of his house since they were at boarding school together.

Bending over at the waist, Sirius stretched to the floor, pressing his palms down between his feet. Then, still bent over, he lifted onto his toes and felt the stretch in his calves. No better way to work off too much whiskey than to sweat it out, he decided.

Rising up, he rose onto the ball of his left foot. Grasping the arch of his right, he stretched his leg up tall, first to the side, then arching it all the way up so his knee pressed near his ear. He twisted it backward, arching his leg so it curved gracefully behind him, just over his head.

He switched legs, repeating the motion, then let out a huge breath. Warmed up, Sirius threw open his bedroom door and headed down the stairs for the kitchen. James was already there, sat at the counter whilst the kettle was on, and he looked up as Sirius entered.

“Morning love,” James said, tilting his head up for a kiss.

Sirius pressed his mouth to James’, cupping James’ cheek gently with his hand. “Good night? You got in after me.”

James, who was reading the paper, set it down on the counter and leant back as Sirius rummaged through the cabinets for a mug and bag of tea. “It was alright. We went for a curry after. You should have stayed.”

Sirius sniffed a loose bag in the cupboard and decided it was good enough. “Nah. I was too pissed. Would have vomited all over the floor and you know how you get when I do that.”

James grimaced. “True.” He flipped the paper closed and set it to the side. “So I heard Lils screaming at you again.”

Sirius rolled his eyes, giving a dramatic turn as he leant back against the counter. “She’s just hacked off because I improved one of her shirts.”

“Sirius,” James moaned.

“She’ll thank me later,” Sirius insisted. “It’ll look better that way. She’s got the cutest figure, she need to show it off.”

Giving a snort, James huffed and reached for a stack of toast perched near his elbow. “Maybe that’s for her to decide what she looks good in. And she doesn’t spent seventy quid on shirts for you to cut them.”

Sirius laughed. “I see you got a worse lecture than I did this morning. At least she only threatened to kill me.”

Stuffing the toast into his mouth, James swiped his hand across a bit of jam on his lip, then walked over and grabbed Sirius by the waist. “I have to work late tonight. Please behave and stop making my girlfriend plot your murder?”

Sirius leant into the embrace, snuffling along James’ neck. “It’s or her own good,” he said in a sing-song tone. “She’ll thank me one day.”

James grabbed Sirius by the chin and planted another kiss on his mouth. “I’m sure she will. Be good today, love.”

“When am I not?” Sirius called after him as James went for his shoes.

“Every other bloody day. Just try not to have a crisis before noon.” With that, he was out, and Sirius filled his mug with water, watching as the dark tendrils of steeped tea crept out of the bag.

Ten minutes later he was properly caffeinated, toeing on his trainers, and heading out. He shoved his headphones into his iPod, and feeling the beat of his favourite underground techno, his feet hit the pavement and he began to run.

*** 

Sat at the park on a bench, Remus Lupin adjusted his beanie for the fifth time. His hair was getting a bit long, which was throwing off the balance of his preferred headwear. His curls were out of control if he didn’t keep them cropped short, and it had been ages since he’d gone in for a trim.

He had a thick book perched on his knee, and on top of that a notebook. His biro was clenched between his teeth, and he had a smudge of ink across his cheek from where he’d tapped it earlier in thought.

Remus liked these mornings at the park. The weather wasn’t bad this time of year—it was spring now and he could go outside without wearing three jumpers and a heavy coat. There were people running, walking their dogs—though twice he’d seen a barmy old man with a fake leg walking a ferret in a harness—and no one really bothered him.

He could sit on a bench with his tea and his notebook and write and no one tried to talk to him or bother him. In fact, often he left his implant at home and kept his hearing aid turned nearly all the way down to appreciate the silence and give people the look of, ‘I’m Deaf, what the fuck do you want?’ and they’d stop bothering.

He wasn’t antisocial, per se. Not in the strictest sense. He told himself he just had very high—near impossible—standards for people he liked to socialise with.

He was at King’s for Journalism, though he’d recently got into Gender Studies and found it far more fascinating than anything else. Remus had grown up in a strict, Orthodox Jewish home in Wales, but when his parents died and he’d been sent to live with his aunt in Scotland, he discovered a whole other life.

Things like being bi-sexual—which was a bit of a shock for him since he’d never really given it much thought before. He always assumed the feelings he had for the lads at school was something closer to envy than fancy. But one day his aunt pointed out that he might want to think about snogging one—then he did and it was brilliant—and all was well.

Remus had grown up differently. At the age of fifteen months he’d contracted meningitis and had spent nearly a full month in hospital trying to not die. He’d come out of it with frail health and profoundly deaf. His parents, being hearing and having no experience with deaf anyone at all, had panicked.

He’d been fitted with hearing aids and sent to speech therapy, but he developed a heavy accent because he couldn’t hear himself nearly at all. When he was five, his doctor recommended a cochlear implant which his parents scrambled to qualify for. He was a good candidate, even though he’d been considered pre-lingually deaf and five was a bit of a stretch to correct any issues with him vocally.

But his parents took the risk and had the implant put in on his right side. His left he wore an aid, and he went to therapy for five long, bloody years. Into his teens he resented having the implant at all. Everything sounded wrong all the time. He felt like he was standing just outside of what was normal, and it was frustrating.

Growing up with it though, he just learnt to deal with it and in their small city there wasn’t a community he could rely on. In fact, he wasn’t introduced to another deaf person until he started at Uni. A bloke called Kingsley and his girlfriend Nymphadora—though no one was allowed to call her that ever unless they wanted a swift punch in the mouth.

Nym, as she preferred, was Hard of Hearing and verbal. Kingsley was Deaf and signed only. Remus spent his first year throwing himself at BSL levels and soon enough was going without his implant completely outside of class.

It was very nice indeed, though his signs were not as fluid as they should have been, if his parents had bothered to let him learn.

But it was what it was, and he tried not to resent the dead.

Leaning back on the bench, Remus’ eyes scanned the park’s crowd. He was sketching in his notebook, a hobby of his. He was quite good, in fact, though he’d never been interested in pursuing it for a career. It was a stress-reliever, really, and gave him an excuse to people watch.

He found everyone just so damned interesting. The profound differences between every single human being often boggled his mind. Growing up he’d known the difference between Jews and Gentiles. There were those in his community, and then the others. He’d grown up with men and women, who eventually married and made tiny men and women.

Then he went to University and met his first trans friend. A woman called Dorcas who explained to him the differences in gender and sexualities and it made him just feel so…alive. Like he’d been kept out of the world for ages, left in this tiny glass case and finally someone opened it.

Dorcas was wonderful. She’d been with her girlfriend Marlene for the better part of six years. They eventually invited him to flat with them as he had the most dreadful time in his own student housing. It was a bit more expensive, but they’d just lost a flatmate and he had a decent job working at a café up the street from their building.

He’d been there two years now, and could not be more pleased. And they never ever bothered him about his implant, even taking the time to learn the basics of sign so they could communicate with him if he felt like being non-verbal.

It was just lovely, really.

Maybe a bit lonely. He didn’t date often. He was poorly often, hated going out, and in general could be a bit unpleasant. It left him with a very small social circle, and there were rarely people who caught his fancy.

But he couldn’t say he was unhappy. He wasn’t. Not really.

As he opened his book, something across the way caught his eye. A person wearing very tight jogging clothes, hair pulled back into a messy bun. They had the most incredible cheekbones Remus had ever seen, and a full mouth set into a grumpy pout. They were fit, to the point where it almost hurt to look at, and Remus was definitely looking.

He watched them as they stood by a tree, stretching and contorting their body into shapes that made his bones ache at the thought, but it was like art. His biro moved from his mouth to his fingers, and from his fingers to the page. He began to draw without thinking, letting the lines create themselves as he kept one eye on this work of art.

Eventually they left, breaking into a jog along the path, and turning the corner. It was a shame, really, but he appreciated the memory of them.

With a sigh, Remus finished up the drawing, then closed the book to glance at his mobile. He had an afternoon shift, so eventually rose and made his way back to the flat. Dorcas and Marlene were both out, so he helped himself to the shower, taking his time and strolling round starkers.

Flopping down on his bed, he put his face in the pillow, set his alarm which would vibrate to wake him up, and decided to have a kip before his soul was carefully sucked out of his body by retail shoppers. It wasn’t the best life, but it was his.

*** 

Sat round the telly, James grabbed what was left from the pizza box, then kicked it to the side of the sofa. “Lily, what lectures do you have tomorrow morning?”

Lily frowned. “Er. I’ve got my Gender Studies. Why?”

“Because I’ve got a rehearsal for next week’s competition,” Sirius answered for James. “I need you both there.”

Lily rolled her eyes. “You need us, Sirius?”

“Yes, I do.” Sirius turned up his chin petulantly.

James sighed, but was smiling a bit. “Sirius, love, when are we not there?”

“Last week you…” Sirius began.

“Other than when it’s a literal family emergency,” James corrected. Sirius pouted, so James grabbed him and pulled him in for a cuddle. “We’ll be there.”

Sirius pressed his cheek against James’ chest and listened to the sound of his heartbeat. “Alright,” he said eventually. A warm hand settled on his lower back, and he felt a wash of contentment flowing over him. As a young child, Sirius had been sorely deprived of affection. His family traditions meant a job well done was rewarded with praise, and on the rarest occasion, a handshake.

It wasn’t until he met James Potter that he experienced his first ever embrace, and it had overwhelmed him at first. In fact, it overwhelmed him so badly he’d punched James right in the face. Then ran to the loo and cried. James found him an hour later and told him it was alright, and he wouldn’t do it again.

Three weeks later Sirius, tentative and afraid, approached James in their empty common room. With hesitant hands, he put his arms round the taller boy’s waist and just stood there. James laughed, then held him tight.

By fifteen their relationship could be considered anything but typical. Mouth on mouth kissing, cuddles in bed. Sirius didn’t sleep alone until after they finished sixth form, and on bad days still crawled between Lily and James.

It was atypical for British kids, but no one in their house seemed to care, really. They loved each other to a ridiculous degree, and Sirius wouldn’t have it any other way.

He was flamboyant and needy, and everyone just accepted that about him.

“I’m getting ice cream,” Lily said after a moment. “Either of you want?”

“Just grab two spoons,” Sirius mumbled.

Lily did, and they all sat back to watch the Great British Bake Off.

*** 

With a travel mug clutched tightly between his hands, Remus stepped into his lecture for the day. It was a smaller than usual class, a handful of students taking the gender studies course, and normally Remus kept to himself. He sat near the back so he could follow the lecture and take notes without being disturbed.

It was one of the most interesting ways he could people watch, really. The opinions in the class differed amongst the students, and most of them meant well, but it often didn’t come across that way. And there were the few, Remus was sure, who had taken the course only to be able to row with people they didn’t agree with.

Like the two blokes up front, Goyle and Yaxley. Thick headed and mouthy, they were often spouting off homophobic rubbish mid-lecture, and trying to challenge their professor on the idea of binary.

This week they’d be working on their final projects for the term. They’d already been given the outline—the class asked to choose from a list of genders and sexualities to write a paper about. Their job was to find a student who fit the definition of the term, and do a case study on them. The students had all been instructed to seek out members of the local LGBT+ groups, and were cautioned about attempting to out anyone without permission.

Remus had been interested in the concept of genderfluid, as he had yet to meet anyone who identified as such. He had a plan to ask his flatmates if they knew anyone who was genderfluid, but his schedule had him missing both Marlene and Dorcas for the better part of the week.

He reckoned he’d be able to get a handle on it sometime that week, and decided not to fuss over it. He took his customary seat near the window, adjusted his earpiece under his beanie, then took out his notebook to prepare for the class.

Several students filed in, one in particular he very much liked. She was a short redhead with fierce green eyes, and an even fiercer tongue. She was quick to jump in to any discussion, and she was very passionate. Several times he’d caught her eye and given her a wide smile when she verbally knocked down Yaxley or Goyle and their talking rubbish.

Lily Evans, she was called, and she smiled at him as she slid into her seat two away from where Remus was set up. The professor arrived a few moments later, and leant on the side of his desk.

“Alright, so everyone has their outlines turned in, I assume?”

The class murmured they did.

“Excellent. Today I’d like to go over our final concept before you’re set free to work on your paper. We won’t be meeting for lectures after this, but I’ll have my office open for anyone who needs help.” Clasping his hands in front of him, the professor took a deep breath. “Pronouns.”

Goyle snorted. “We got English today, is that the change?”

Remus rolled his eyes as he tapped his biro on the corner of his paper. “Idiot,” he whispered to himself.

“I’m speaking more in the terms of preferred pronouns,” the professor said with a very patient smile. Remus had to wonder how he did it without going mad some days. “We have our usual, she-her, he-him. And we have pronouns that are gender neutral. Their-theirs. However there’s a rising culture of people who do not identify as part of the gender binary, or people who prefer that children not be subjected to the idea of gender binary, and are pushing for alternatives.”

Lily raised her hand. “Like Zie-Zir.”

“Exactly,” the professor said.

Yaxley snorted. “Rubbish.”

Turning a careful eye to his front-row student, the professor raised an eyebrow. “Rubbish, is it? Is that because it’s unfamiliar to you?”

“Well I just think the whole idea is rubbish. I mean, it’s not a difficult concept. You got a cock-you’re a man. You got a fanny- you’re a woman. Something we’ve all been taught since we was kids, innit?”

Remus rolled his eyes, his tongue begging to argue. Lily, however, spoke first. “Only because we’ve been conditioned by society to believe there’s a need for gender binary. I mean yes, I’m a cis woman, but I’ve at least had the opportunity to question whether or not this is something I prefer. And it’s not because I was born with a vagina. It’s simply because that’s who I am.”

“So you’re saying you’d agree with someone who just says, I ain’t no gender at all?” Yaxley demanded. “Why not just go for calling them an it.”

“Because, you fucking waste of humanity,” Remus said, surprised but unable to stop himself, “they’re human beings. They deserve to be treated as human beings. They’re not less simply because they don’t fall under what you’ve been conditioned to believe is normal.”

Everyone in the class turned to look at him, and Remus realised it may have been the first time he’d ever spoken aloud. Even the professor was giving him a look. 

“Exactly,” Lily said, breaking the tension. “Pronouns are a personal choice. I happen to have someone I love very dearly who identifies as both.”

“Like a he-she?” Goyle sniggered.

“No, you fucking arse. Some days he feels more like a woman, and some days he feels more like a man. Some days he feels like neither.”

“Yet you’re calling it a he?”

“Because _he_ prefers those pronouns you absolute fucking wanker,” Lily spat. “Because they’re his choice.”

Remus was looking at her very carefully, and she looked back, giving him a secret smile. 

“I just think it’s a load of rubbish,” Goyle said. “I mean, you seriously expect us to modify everything we do because some point-whatever percent of people think they don’t need to be a gender?”

Lily’s face went pink, but Remus cut in again. “Just because they’re a smaller percentage doesn’t make them less worthy of respect. How pathetic is your life that you feel put upon simply because someone wants you to _ask_ what they prefer to be called? You ask someone’s name, don’t you? You don’t walk up to a complete stranger and say, ‘Oy, you look like a Roger to me, so I think I’ll call you Roger.’ And you certainly don’t tell someone, ‘Your name’s not very popular so you shouldn’t be called that,’. Or if you do, you deserve to have your face bashed in.”

The entire class was watching as Remus stared down Goyle and Yaxley.

“I still think it’s just a load of queer rubbish,” Goyle muttered.

“Enough,” the professor said darkly. “I have made it very plain I will not tolerate slurs in this class.”

“He called me pathetic. You got nothing to say about that?” Goyle challenged.

“Well your opinion was a bit pathetic, wasn’t it?” the professor said, and Remus almost laughed. Almost.

*** 

As the lecture let out, Remus gathered his things, and turned to see Lily hovering near his desk. She gave him a tentative smile, which he returned.

“I’m Lily.”

His smile widened. “I know. Remus.”

“I wanted to say thanks. For earlier. I know you don’t like talking a lot in class, but I swear if I had to combat those two fucking tossers on my own one more time…”

“It was a long time coming,” Remus said from behind a sigh. He hiked his pack up on his shoulder and they started out of the room together. “I should have said something ages ago.”

“It’s fine, really. But just…it’ll be nice to go home and tell my boyfriend and flatmates I had backup.”

Remus laughed. “Well good. Glad to be of service.” They stopped by the doors and he hesitated before asking, “Do you really have a mate who’s genderfluid?”

Lily gave a careful nod. “Yeah. Live with him, actually.”

“Do you think…” Remus took a breath. “I mean, would you ask him if he’d mind being my case study? If he’s out, that is.”

Lily giggled a little. “Oh he’s out, believe me. Not sure he was ever really in. Even before he had the proper words for it.”

Remus smiled at her. “So you wouldn’t mind?”

“Not at all. Actually he cheers for the KCL Hippogriffs, and he’s got a practise this afternoon. I can ask him, and if he’s alright with it, maybe you could come by and meet him?”

Remus shrugged. “Yeah, that would be alright. All I’ve got this afternoon is the Prophet meeting.”

Lily’s eyes widened. “The Prophet? You write for it?”

Remus shrugged, his cheeks going pink. “Yeah a bit. And edit. I mean, we’re short-handed a lot, so most of us have several jobs. Actually I think we might be doing something on the cheer competition, so I might be able to work both in if I can snag the story.”

“Excellent,” Lily said. “Give me your number, alright?”

“Sure,” Remus said slowly. “But er…text me, okay? I can’t hear well enough to talk on mobile.”

Lily eyed, him something in her eyes flashing like she understood. He had a feeling it was his accent, but she didn’t call attention to it. Instead she put his number into her mobile, then sent him a hello text. “All saved,” she said with a grin.

Remus smiled back. “I should get going, but you’ll let me know soon, yeah?”

“Definitely. And again, thanks.”

Remus nodded. “Any time.” They parted ways, and Remus had a small smile on his face as he headed off to the meeting.

*** 

“Alright so Lupin,” Gideon said, pacing the floor. “You really want this piece?”

Remus nodded. “I’ll be going by the rehearsals today anyway, so it makes sense.” Remus had just gotten the text from Lily saying that her flatmate would be happy to chat with him about gender. She sent him the address to their rehearsals and said to meet at half eleven.

“Okay well I’d like you to get a sit down with the captain, and their male cheerleader.”

Remus frowned. “Who’s that, then?”

“Sirius Black. He’s the only one they’ve got, and it’s not really a compelling story, but it’s something. They’ve not been doing well the past two years. Alice Prewett—she’s the captain—said she’s hoping with the new addition they’ll be in the running.”

Remus was scribbling, and as he did, he had to wonder if this Sirius Black was actually Lily’s friend. It would be just like Gideon to not understand Sirius wasn’t a male cheerleader at all. Gideon cared about scoops and gimmicks. That was it.

Glancing at his mobile, Remus realised he had just enough time to make it if he left immediately. “I’m off,” he said, grabbing his pack. “I’ll email you later with my rough draft.”

Waving him off, Gideon was engaged in a short row with his brother about a handful of the edits. Knowing he was no longer needed, Remus rushed out and headed for the massive warehouse the KCL Hippogriffs had let for their practises that year.

It wasn’t far, just a ten minute walk, and Remus had his Prophet badge ready when he approached the door. Peering inside, he felt more than heard the sound of thumping music, and he stepped inside. The place was set up like a gymnasium. There was a carpeted floor, elevated on springs for the cheerleaders to practise their routines and flips. A set of weights was in the corner, and a few pieces of exercise equipment to go along with it.

A handful of benches were off to the side, and Remus spotted Lily sat with two other people. She caught his eye and waved him over.

Feeling a little uncomfortable, Remus trudged over and smiled. “Hi.”

Lily beamed up at him, then nudged the bloke beside her to get his attention. He was tall, very fit, looked to be Indian with dark skin and wild black hair. He had a pair of black, square-framed glasses, and a very bright grin.

“James, this is Remus. The one I told you about earlier.”

“Ah, social justice warrior,” James said, extending his hand.

Remus took it and smiled. “Er, she might have sold me a bit much, mate.”

“Never,” Lily admonished. She pat the seat next to her, and Remus dropped down. “His arguments were really good. Very spot on. Got that fucking wanker Goyle speechless, which was better than I could do.”

Remus snorted. “Lily, I’ve seen you tear both him and Yaxley to shreds. Don’t sell yourself short.”

“Oh no worry there, mate,” James said with a wink. “I know she’s a fierce warrior.”

Lily beamed. “Well anyway, it was great. So you here to report or just to talk to my flatmate?”

Remus looked down at his interview questions. “Actually both. My editor’s got me an interview with Alice Prewett as well as Sirius Black.”

“Oh,” Lily said with delight. “Sirius is the one. My flatmate. That’ll be good, won’t it?”

Remus nodded, but before he could say anything, loud music began to thrum. Flinching, he reached up to switch off his implant and with a discrete motion, removed his hearing aid. He let out a sigh when the room went mostly silent, the only remnants of the song left a vibration through his feet, and the very faint humming from his residual hearing in his right ear.

Remus picked up his notebook and began to jot down thoughts as the cheerleaders began to group. He could see one, tallish with long brown hair tied up high on the back of her head, start to shout. Her mouth moved in commands he couldn’t read from her lips, but the others nodded and began to form a line across the floor.

Remus’ eyes searched out the crowd, and when he caught sight of Sirius, his breath caught in his throat. Sirius was the gorgeous runner from the park. He was in tight black leggings now, and a tank top with glitter smeared across the front, but the rest of him was the same. The elegant face, the long black hair in a bun. He was smiling as well, his eyes laughing as he bobbed his head to the music.

Alice, Remus assumed, was shouting at them again. Her hands were clapping rhythmically, and then they began to dance.

Remus hadn’t really seen a cheer routine before. It had never struck him as interesting, but as he watched, he became fascinated. It was a mixture of dance and gymnastic moves mostly, but the dance was nothing like he’d ever seen at the discos. It was stiff, very formed, arms going up into high Vs, then dropping down. They spun and flipped and moved.

And Sirius was something to behold. He was unbelievably flexible. Several times he’d held his heel, arching his leg out behind him, then curving it toward his head. He twisted, flipped back-hand springs and tucks, landing with a grace Remus was certain he would never be able to achieve with anything in life.

And he smiled. His grin lit his entire face, and Remus felt his heart patter against the inside of his ribs. This was not good. He could not fancy this person. It was his job to approach both the article and his paper without bias and he couldn’t do that with his stomach gone all wobbly.

Taking a breath, he forced himself to watch other cheerleaders until it was over.

The whole thing lasted half an hour, with four separate routines total. Eventually the music died down, so Remus switched his implant back on, though he left the aid out. When the chatter began to drone into his head, he let out the smallest sigh and turned to Lily.

“Did you like it?” she asked, her smile wide and friendly.

Remus couldn’t help but grin back. “I did. I’m surprised, you know? I’ve never bothered to watch before. Always seemed a bit silly but…they’re fantastic, aren’t they?”

James turned to grin at him. “It’s far more athletic than people think, you know. They have these barmy assumptions—skirts and pom poms…”

“Though Sirius loves those a bit as well,” Lily said with a laugh.

James rolled his eyes. “Only when he’s pissed. But really though, I couldn’t do it.”

“James plays rugby,” Lily clarified.

“For Kings?” Remus asked.

James puffed out his chest. “Yeah. Love it, but trust me mate, I don’t work nearly as hard as this lot.”

As if on cue, a sweaty and slightly out of breath Sirius Black bounded over and came to a stop in front of James. Grabbing him by the face, Sirius planted a soft kiss to the corner of James’ mouth, then leant over to give one as well to Lily.

“You brought a friend?” he asked.

Remus strained to hear the voice, though with the implant it was never proper. But there was a sort of chest-deep quality to it that Remus liked a rather lot. “Remus Lupin,” he said, catching Sirius’ attention.

Sirius blinked, then grinned. “Oh. The bloke with the paper in Lily’s class?”

“Er. Yes,” Remus said. “But apparently I’m also here from the Prophet to interview you and Alice.”

“She might’ve mentioned. We’ve got to get cleaned up a bit. You want to come round in about five minutes?”

Remus nodded, and watched Sirius skip off with the rest of the team. He turned back to Lily. “Friendly sort?”

“Needy’s more like,” Lily said, but her tone was fond. She looked down at her watch and swore. “Bugger, I’ve my maths lecture in ten minutes. James, be a love and drive me? Sirius’ got the bike, hasn’t he?”

James nodded and got up from the bench. “Nice to meet you, Remus. Maybe I’ll see you round?”

“Maybe.” Remus, who was not the most social, wouldn’t bet on it, but he wondered if he wouldn’t hate seeing James again.

“Tell Sirius we’ll see him at home, and to text me later,” Lily called as James dragged her by the hand toward the door.

It left Remus alone, a bit fidgety on the bench, as he waited for Sirius to return. He did so, five minutes later with Alice at his elbow. He was now wearing jeans expertly torn round the knees, and a flowing black shirt with a white silhouette of a wolf howling at the moon on the front. Standing up, Remus extended a hand to both of them, and felt another hot rush as Sirius’ warm fingers closed round his.

“You’re the one Gideon sent?” Alice asked.

Remus nodded. “Yeah. Asked me to have a word about the team and the competition.”

She looked toward the door, then back to Remus. “Are those the questions?”

Remus glanced down at the sheet Gideon had given him, then back up. “Er. They are.”

“Good. Let me fill them out, yeah? And I’ll email them. It’s just, I’m late to meet my fiancé and it’s been every day for the last week.”

Remus grabbed his biro and scribbled his email address on the page. “Just pop them to me later. I can fill in the rest. I’ll make it look like we had a nice sit down chat.”

Alice grinned widely. “Good man, Remus. See you.” She winked at Sirius before hurrying off, leaving the two of them stood near the bench.

“Shall I do the same?” Sirius offered.

Remus shook his head. “Only if you want. I’ve got my whole afternoon free. And Lily said you might be alright if we chat a bit.”

“I could do with some lunch, maybe a coffee? You peckish?”

Remus realised he hadn’t had anything since his toast early that morning. He didn’t have a lot to spend, but he had enough for chips and a coffee. “Alright. You know anywhere good?”

Sirius did. It was a small restaurant nearby with a decent menu. Remus ordered a veggie sandwich and a side of chips, and Sirius smirked at him.

“What?” Remus demanded.

“Vegetarian, are you?”

Remus flushed. “Vegan, actually. Does that offend you?”

He snorted. “No. But my eating habits are total shit. I think Alice would kill for me to go vegan for a few weeks. A day even.”

Sirius had ordered a bacon sandwich and fizzy drink, which made Remus chuckle. “Fair enough, but it’s not for health reasons. I mean, I’ve just always been.”

“Not for me to judge, mate.” Sirius lounged back with a casual air that Remus deeply appreciated. He slung one arm over the back of his chair, kicking his foot up on the one next to Remus, and grinned. “So. Shall we talk about cheer? Or the gender stuff?”

“You have a preference?”

“Not really. I like talking about myself a lot, you see. I’m a narcissist.”

Remus barked a laugh, reaching up to adjust his beanie lower, his head shaking. “Alright. Well. How about the gender stuff as I think most of my questions about cheer are for Alice. And frankly the ones Gideon sent me for you might be a bit offensive.”

Sirius’ eyebrows shot up. “Offensive how? Dirty, are they? Want to know all my sordid secrets?”

Remus’ cheeks flushed a bit, his head shaking. “More like wanting to know what it’s like to be the only male on the cheer team.” When Sirius’ face fell, Remus sighed. “Exactly. I didn’t want to make you make that face.”

“Not your fault, mate,” Sirius said, waving his hand. “I mean, considering you’re here to talk to me about my actual gender, I reckon you didn’t write them.”

Remus studied his face for a moment, seeing the hurt behind his eyes, and although he couldn’t know exactly what it was like, he had some idea. He pursed his lips a bit. “I didn’t. And how about this, we reschedule the cheer interview and I’ll modify everything. I’m not going to sit here and insult your gender because my editor is a fucking twat.”

There was a pause, then Sirius threw back his head and laughed. The twinkle was back in his grey eyes, and he reached out, giving Remus’ shoulder a squeeze. “You’re a good sort.”

Remus shrugged, feeling his face flush again. “Just not an arse. But I reckon there’s not enough of non-arses these days.”

“No,” Sirius said with a laugh, “there isn’t.” 

The conversation halted when food arrived, and as Remus had to study lips to get the full scope of conversations, he elected to put the questions on pause until Sirius had finished his meal. Instead they exchanged shy glances and a few chuckles until Sirius pushed his plate away.

“Judas Priest, I feel so much better.”

Remus raised an eyebrow at him. “Did you just say Judas Priest?”

“It’s more original than Jesus Christ.”

Remus snorted, covering his laugh with the sleeve of his jumper. “Alright, then.”

Sirius grinned wildly. “So. Shall we get started? Or would you like to continue this convo elsewhere?”

Remus shrugged, then reached down for his notebook. When he came back up, Sirius was lounging back once more. “Well, honestly I’m not sure where I want the direction of my paper to go. There are a couple of morons in my class who seem to think anything than cis-gender binary is all made up, and their most favourite thing to do is throw round homophobic slurs. I’d like to present something that’s a bit of a…er…”

“Fuck you, you fucking fucks?” Sirius offered.

Remus smiled. “Exactly.”

“Well I could always come in, parade round in my most favourite dress, then snog you in front of everyone, but I’m not sure your prof would give you good marks for it.”

Remus felt his cheeks go pink again. “Er. Likely not.” He tapped his biro on the page, then said, “You could tell me how you figured yourself out. Unless you were raised knowing about things like genderfluid.”

Sirius barked a laugh which sounded very bitter considering the circumstances. “That’s a no, darling. My family was not in any way progressive at all. In fact my ‘antics’,” he used air quotes, “rather got me kicked out.”

Remus blinked. “Kicked out?”

“And disinherited. You can write that down, if you like. It was a bit public. My father was an MP, and it caused a bit of a scandal.”

Remus hurried to scribble, then looked back up at Sirius. “I’m really sorry. That’s dreadful.”

“It worked out for the best. Moved in with James. His parents are the best. Treat me like a second child. Indulge all my theatrics.” He waggled his brows a bit, and Remus laughed. “Honestly, they’re a good sort. As for sorting myself out, you know I hadn’t really given myself a label until last year. Lily was the one who brought it up. She’d read about it in one of her gender studies books and asked me to look into it.” He heaved a sigh, reaching up to pull his hair from the tie, and it fell in soft waves round his shoulders. “Seemed to fit.”

“She said you prefer masculine pronouns. Even when you’re having a…er…” Remus wasn’t sure what to call it.

“When I’m a woman?” Sirius offered.

Remus nodded. “Exactly.”

With a shrug, Sirius carded his fingers through his hair to loosen the tangles. “Honestly I never felt compelled to change it. I’m just me. I’m comfortable with masculine pronouns. For a long time I felt like I should do something different, then James pointed out I was only making myself miserable. And believe me, I do not like to be miserable.”

“Most narcissists don’t,” Remus pointed out.

Sirius barked a laugh. “No,” he said between giggles, “no they do not. Anyway, I think once I had that sorted, I felt more comfortable just going round in dresses when I felt like it. Or…whatever really. I have a painful love of nail polish, and lip gloss. I never cut my hair, and I’m allowed glitter in small doses—that’s James’ rule though after he was forced to go to lectures a bit more sparkly than he prefers.”

Remus snorted. “Really?”

Sirius grinned widely with his nod. “It was worth the three-day cold shoulder. But I reckon that’s all there’s really to tell about me.”

Remus licked his lips, looking down as he scribbled notes. When he looked up, he decided to word his question carefully. “Have you noticed that this particular identity has affected your sexuality? Or your preferences?”

Sirius leant forward a bit, meeting Remus’ eyes. “Are you asking if I go for cute boys in beanies and jumpers, Remus Lupin?”

Remus’ face went hot. “Er. No. I mean…er…”

Sirius laughed. “Find your chill, love. I’m joking.” He winked at Remus and sat back again. “I think I was always pan. I have preferences, and those didn’t change when I discovered my gender identity.”

Remus scribbled that down, then closed the book. “Well that gives me somewhere to start.”

For a second, Sirius looked vaguely disappointed. “Is that it, then?”

“For today.” Remus shoved his book into his pack, then reached for his wallet to pull out a tenner. “I’ll have more specific questions once I decide the direction my paper is going to take. Will you have time to meet me again?”

Sirius nodded. “Of course. In fact, you can come round ours. I’m sure Lily would love it. She was singing your praises all bloody morning after you went off on those two idiots.”

Remus laughed. “She’s easily impressed.”

“Or you’re just extra impressive.” Sirius’ eyes fell on the note, and he scoffed. “Oh no, I invited you.” Remus attempted to protest, but Sirius refused to hear of it, and eventually, to avoid a scene, he slipped it back into his pocket and let it go.

After the bill was paid, they headed outside and walked in the direction of the warehouse. “So I’ve got two lectures, and a shift at my work tomorrow, but we could meet after. It would be closer to tea, though.”

“Works for me,” Sirius said. “I’ve got a physics paper due, so I’ll be on that nearly all day. You have a mobile?”

Remus nodded as he pulled it out. “Text only though, alright?”

Sirius gave him a funny look, but shrugged as he snatched it away and put his number in the contacts. “There. I’ve sent myself a text so I have yours as well. I’ll give you the address and you can drop by round seven.”

Remus nodded, starting to speak when a warm hand touched his wrist. “Er?”

“Can I hug you? I really love hugs.”

Unable to say no to those pleading grey eyes, Remus nodded and managed to suppress a small yelp as Sirius wrapped his arms round his middle and stuck his face right into the crook of Remus’ neck. He swore, for just a second, he felt lips press to his skin, but they were gone before he could investigate further.

Sirius pulled back, then squeezed Remus’ wrist. “It was good to meet you.”

“Same,” Remus said. He tipped Sirius a wave, then walked off. And if there was an extra bounce to his step as he made his way to the tube, well Remus wasn’t going to acknowledge it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Please note there is a part in the fic which contains transphobia and slurs. If this triggers you, skip from where it starts:**
> 
> **Before either of the women could say anything, a voice from behind spoke, and it set Remus immediately on edge. “Oy, didn’t think we’d find you here.”**
> 
> **And ends: The pair hurried off, and James turned to Remus and his flatmates. “Ladies, Remus, you okay?”**
> 
> Otherwise the rest of this fic is actually really fluffier than I think I intended, but hopefully it's in keeping with the tone. I've been a bit off my writing game lately--but getting better and trying to get everything updated. See the end of chapter for final notes.

Laid across his bed, Remus was checking his email when the door to his bedroom opened. He had his speech processor off, so he didn’t hear the noise, but the movement startled him. Looking up, he saw Marlene’s face grinning up at him.

Holding up a finger, he reached for his processor and after a moment, had it switched on. “Yes, love?”

“Just got in. Dori popped into the shower, but I wanted to know how your afternoon went.”

Remus yawned, leaning back against his pillow, and shoved his laptop to the side so she could flop on his bed. “It went alright. I got a subject for my genderfluid paper. He also cheers for the Hippogriffs.”

Marlene blinked. “Oh god. You mean Sirius Black.”

Remus’ eyebrows shot up. “You know him?”

“Love, everyone knows Sirius sodding Black.”

Remus sniffed. “Well I didn’t.”

“He’s…well he’s Sirius, in’ne? We were at school together, actually. Isn’t he with the Potters? Living there?”

Remus nodded. “So he said. I’m there tomorrow after my work shift to finish up our interview. I’m only waiting on Alice now…” Just as he said it, his laptop icon flashed, letting him know he had an email. “Bet that’s her now.” Remus pulled his laptop over and opened it. She’d emailed the entire interview.

“So what’s the bit for the paper, then?” Marlene asked.

Remus huffed. “Gideon wanted me to do an interview with Alice since she’s the captain, then one with Sirius since he’s the only _male_ on the team.”

Marlene pulled a face. “Of all the cissexist bullshit…”

“I know,” Remus said. “I’ve modified the interview. Gideon might throw it out, but I don’t give a shit. I’m not turning something like that in.”

“The worst of it is, Gideon knows Sirius as well. He’s being an arse,” Marlene groused.

Remus pulled a face. “Well that’s even more lovely, and even more reason to do what I want.” He scrolled through Alice’s questions and his face brightened. “Look here. She was asked how she deals with the diversity now that they’ve added a male cheerleader onto the team.”

“And,” Marlene pressed.

“Well I can’t answer this question,” Remus read, “because we don’t have one.” 

Lifting an eyebrow, Marlene asked, “And that’s it?”

“That’s it,” Remus affirmed.

“Good on her. I knew I liked her. Her and that Frank. Good people.” She stretched and yawned. “I’m off to bed, love. Will I see you in the morning?”

Remus shook his head. “Early lectures, work, then off to chat with Sirius. So maybe the evening? We can do take-away.”

Marlene grinned. “If Sirius lets you. He can be a bit…consuming.” When Remus lifted his eyebrows again, she laughed. “You’re a little bit his type, love.”

Remus shook his head. “Couldn’t get involved even if I wanted to. I’m…he’s…the subject of my paper and… and…”

“It’ll be best if you don’t fight it.” She winked at him. “Really, you could do a lot worse. Night love.”

When she ambled off, Remus switched his processor off again, and set it aside. Settling pleasantly into the silence, he pulled up the rest of Alice’s questions and began to form them into what sounded like a proper interview. He added in the connective text, sorted the questions into a natural format, then saved it to his drive.

Just as he decided to shut down for the night, his mobile began to buzz and he picked it up. The name Sirius flashed across the screen, and he swiped it open.

**Sleeping?**

_Not as such. Just sorting out Alice’s interview. Everything alright?_

**Brilliant, in fact. Just had a delicious bit of Greek food, and settling in to watch an Avengers Marathon. The whole two.**

Remus snorted at the screen. _Not seen them, but I’ve never really been big into those superhero types._

**Blasphemy! You’re coming over to watch with us one day. Because we do this like weekly. Also I wanted to let you know James wants to have some people over tomorrow and I just learnt via rather adorable text that you’re flatmates with Dori and Marls. So say yes? Please, darling?**

_Throwing round darlings gets you nowhere, you know. But I’ll see how I feel. Parties can be a bit overwhelming for me._

**What if I promise to let you hide up in my bedroom? It’s really lovely up here. Bed’s comfy, I have loads to do if you get bored.**

_I’ll think about it._

**I wish you could see my pout right now, Remus Lupinus. Because I’ll have you know it’s glorious and it would get you to do all sorts of dastardly and dirty things. Including enjoy our party.**

*pic*

If Remus stared at the picture for longer than was technically necessary, well no one would really know. _That is a pout to rival all pouts. Sigh. What if I promise to stay an hour at least? Will that appease your majesty?_

**My heart is no longer broken. I’ll see you tomorrow. xx**

Remus set his mobile on the nightstand and flicked off the light. If he went to sleep with a small grin of his face well, no one had to know that, either.

*** 

“Who are you sending that selfie to?” James demanded, watching Sirius out of the corner of his eye. “And why the bloody fuck are you pouting like that?”

“It was Remus, and I’m trying to get him to agree to come to the party tomorrow. Marls just texted and said he lives with her and Dori.”

James’ eyebrow went up. “Really? He must be a good sort of she hasn’t chucked him out on his arse.”

Sirius grinned widely. “And he’s just said he’ll stay an hour. Which we all know is all the time I need.”

James eyes narrowed a bit. “Sirius, don’t…get overly attached, alright?”

Sirius pulled a face. “When do I ever? Honestly.”

“Well,” James admitted, “almost never. But you’ve put your heart out there before, and honestly I’m getting a bit old to be smashing blokes faces in.”

“You won’t have to with him. It’s nothing, really.”

“You’ve been grinning all day,” James accused.

“What, like smiling is a crime now?” Sirius demanded. “How dare you! How dare your face, Jamie! How dare you say that to my face!”

“Oh shut up, you bloody child.”

Sirius launched himself at James, and as always, was caught in his arms. He tucked himself into James’ side and let out a long breath. “He’s rather cute though, isn’t he? And he knows about me. You know, nearly everything. Or will once we’ve finished his paper. I mean, no surprises there.”

“I suppose not.”

“And Lily likes him,” Sirius continued on.

James let out a small hum. “She does have good judge in character.” He reached down, tipping Sirius’ face up by his chin, and pressed a soft kiss to his mouth. “It’s my job to worry. And to immediately dislike anyone with the potential to hurt you.”

Sirius bat his eyelashes up at James, smiling sweetly. “And I know. Which is why I keep you round. But honestly, I wouldn’t mind something proper. Just…with someone who gets me.”

“And you think this Remus is that someone?”

Sirius shook his head. “I don’t know anything about him. He’s just cute and was fun to have lunch with. And I trust Lils. So sue me if I flirt a bit.”

James carded his fingers through Sirius’ hair as the film began, and he let out the smallest breath. “Then go for it, mate. Just know you’ve always got me.”

*** 

Feeling thoroughly harassed by general society, Remus arrived at the Sirius’ a bit exhausted, and craving nothing more than to turn off his processor and lay in the quiet of his room. But he had promised, and had received no less than twenty texts from Sirius ranging from honest questions, to random facts about his day.

Remus shouldn’t have found them endearing at all, he should have been annoyed. Had it been anyone else on the bloody planet he would have been annoyed. Instead he felt a spring in his step as he walked up the footpath to the building.

It was clear a party was happening. There were people standing about having a smoke, and someone at the door who looked like they were minding the people coming and going. As Remus got closer, his eyes focused on his flatmates who were grinning at him.

“You made it!” Marlene said.

Dori pulled Remus in for a hug, kissing his cheek. “Marls bet me you’d skive off since there’s an actual party happening.”

Remus shrugged. “Thought it might be rude if I did that.”

Before either of the women could say anything, a voice from behind spoke, and it set Remus immediately on edge. “Oy, didn’t think we’d find you here.”

Remus turned slowly to see both Goyle and Yaxley stood there, looking pompous as ever. “You were invited?”

“Everyone was,” Goyle said with a shrug.

Remus had a hard time believing Lily Evans would let these two into her home, but he couldn’t be positive. He didn’t know her, or anyone who lived there, well at all. “Just surprised you’d want to bother. Since a lot of us might be a bit too queer for you.”

Goyle’s eyes narrowed. “Maybe we thought we could peruse the homos for our paper.” He glanced at Dori and smirked. “You’re one of them, ain’t you? A shemale?”

Immediately snapping, Remus launched himself at Goyle, but was caught by the face in Goyle’s large fingers. He squeezed Remus’ jaw hard, grinning at him. Remus took a swing, but the bruising grip shoved him just out of reach. “Fuckin’ homo,” Goyle breathed.

Yaxley started to laugh when a fist came out of nowhere, hitting Goyle dead-centre in the face. He stumbled back, letting Remus go who managed to catch himself before he fell. He was breathing hard through his nose, his rage palpable, but James Potter was backing the two up with threats of involving both his continued fists, and the police.

“Don’t be such an arsehole, Potter,” Yaxley said. 

“I will kill you. No remorse, no hesitation, if you show up near my home or my friends again.” James’ voice was low, dangerous, and though Remus’ ability to read tones was fairly shit, he could tell James meant it.

The pair hurried off, and James turned to Remus and his flatmates. “Ladies, Remus, you okay?”

Remus was rubbing his jaw, but looking back at both Marlene and Dori who looked more angry than anything else. “I’m going to fucking cut him to pieces,” Marlene hissed.

Dori put an arm on her girlfriend’s shoulder. “Can we just go get a drink? I really bloody need one.” She then looked over at Remus. “You okay, love?”

Remus wriggled his jaw, then nodded. “I’ll be fine. Go on.”

He stood there as the girls went in, and startled when a hand landed on his shoulder. James’ very gentle fingers cupped Remus’ chin, turning his head, then the tips brushed along where he was sure it was going to bruise.

“Let me put something on this,” James said in a quiet tone.

“I’m fine.”

James’ eyes went narrow. “Look, I play rugby, which means I know all the tricks to minimising bruising. And the fact is, I’m the house mum, just ask anyone. I think Sirius might actually attempt to kill me if I let you go upstairs before doing something about this.”

Remus closed his eyes slowly, then opened them. “Alright. But can we not say anything about it?”

James nodded, then put his arm round Remus’ waist and they walked in together. Unfamiliar with so much touching, Remus wasn’t sure how to react. But he let James steer him to a seat in the kitchen, then went to the cabinet for a small pot of jelly-like cream.

“It’s got a bit of a funny smell,” James said, taking a bit on his first and middle finger. “But it helps.” With that, he began to dab it along Remus’ jaw, and immediately there was a tingling sensation. It wasn’t bad, and the smell was somewhat pleasant.

“What is it?” Remus asked after a minute.

“Well it’s got lavender and tea tree. Helps with circulation and some other stuff. Dunno, but it works. You might still get marked up but it won’t be as bad.”

Remus let out a puff of air as James turned his face from side to side, making sure he’d got it completely. After a minute, he gave Remus’ shoulder a squeeze.

“Er. Thanks,” Remus said, his voice very soft.

James swiped his hands down on the front of his jeans, giving Remus a careful look. “Are you alright?”

Remus swallowed, then nodded. “Fine.”

James looked like he didn’t entirely believe him. “I know we met for all of half an hour, but if you need anything…”

Remus took a breath, then straightened his shoulders. “Honestly, I’ve had worse. And not that it’s ever okay, but I appreciate what you did.”

James nodded, then took a step back so Remus could hop off the chair. “Well, you should tell Sirius. He’ll be upset if he finds out through someone else.”

Remus winced, but nodded as he grabbed his pack and let James direct him past the partygoers, on up the stairs to Sirius’ bedroom. It was the last at the end of a short hall, the door half-open. Sirius was sat on his bed with his laptop on his shins, glaring at it as though it was shouting insults at him.

Remus appeared in the door, giving a small cough, and Sirius looked up. “Oh! Oh thank god. You’re here to save me.”

Remus blinked, then took a step in. “Er? From the evil, dastardly laptop?”

“It’s mocking me,” Sirius growled. “It’s sat here all…all smug with its ability to hold words and yet be _incomplete_.”

Remus dropped his pack on the end of Sirius’ bed. “Ah. The dreaded physics paper?”

Sirius sniffed indignantly. “It’s evil. It’s a conspiracy against me that I would be any sodding good at physics and think I could actually get a bloody degree in it.”

Remus laughed just a little as he glanced round the room, taking in the way Sirius had spread himself just all over it. The walls were covered from floor to ceiling with posters. Some vintage punk bands, others of models, and celebrities. There was an entire wall of photographs, mostly of Sirius, James, Lily, and another bloke Remus didn’t recognise. The wardrobe in the corner was bursting with clothes, many of them laid haphazardly round the floor nearby. There was a vanity positively covered in different polishes, lip gloss colours, and other various make-up tools.

Remus turned back to the bed and smiled. “Well, I can distract you with incredibly boring interview questions. Or we can pretend we’ve got none at all and you can go down to the party.”

Sirius contemplated, then sighed. “Normally I’d choose party and get pissed and order everyone to dance, but I’m not in the mood tonight. Honestly this paper is due in two days and I’m not done, and I have to make sure it’s edited before I send it in. I’m actually rather stressed.”

Remus took a step over. “Er, d’you mind if I sit nearby? I need to lipread.”

Sirius blinked at him, and as a way of affirming his statement, Remus pulled his beanie off so his implant was visible. Sirius blinked again. “You’re Deaf?”

Remus shrugged. “I use an implant. But the one I’ve got’s a bit old and I was kind of a shit candidate for it anyway. So it was never as good as some people got.”

“Is there…should I…” Sirius swallowed. “I mean, can I help? Or…we can shut the door if the music’s too distracting.”

Remus reached over and let it close almost all the way, smiling a little. “You don’t mind, do you?” he asked, his eyes darting to the bed.

Sirius scrambled to move his laptop, crossing his legs in front of him to give Remus a bit more room. “No I…sorry. Shit.” As Remus got settled, Sirius stared at him. “Fuck you know, I thought your accent was a bit funny, but I didn’t want to be rude. God and now I am being rude and…fucking buggering hell.”

Remus couldn’t help his chuckle. “It’s fine, Sirius. I promise.”

Sirius swallowed again, then chanced a grin which was less confident than his previous ones. He stared hard at Remus, and then his eyebrows went up. “Why d’you smell like James’ barmy rugby shit?”

Remus’ hand reflexively went to his jaw and he looked away. “Oh er…there was an incident. Outside. A little while ago.”

Sirius leant forward. “What incident? What happened?”

“Those two arseholes from the gender studies lecture,” Remus said. “They showed up.”

Sirius’ eyebrows shot up. “What? Here?”

“They said…” Remus’ throat tightened against repeating the word. “Well they used a rather nasty slur to my flatmate Dori.”

Sirius’ eyes went immediately dark. “And?” he pressed.

“And I sort of…lost my shit. Went at him. But well, he’s rather stronger than I am and bigger and he grabbed me by the face.” Remus rubbed his jaw again. “James punched him in the mouth.”

Sirius’ hands were trembling a bit as he sat back. “He’s going to murder them.”

“He looked close to it.” Remus let out a breath. “They left and James forced this stuff on me to help with the bruising.”

“Fuck. Fucking hell, I am so sorry,” Sirius breathed.

Remus waved off the apology. “It’s not fine, but I’ll live. I think I’m more worried about Dori. What he said was…” Remus swallowed. “Doesn’t bear repeating, but he deserves to be eviscerated for it.”

Sirius looked a bit ill as he shifted over so he could sit just a little closer to Remus. “Well, do you feel up to doing any of this? Because I could go and get us a few drinks and we can put a film on my laptop and tell the world to fuck off.”

Remus wanted to insist they get to work, because he should absolutely not be doing any of this with Sirius. He didn’t _know_ him, and he was his paper’s subject, and it was unethical. But he found himself leaning back and nodding his head and saying, “You know, maybe that wouldn’t be all that bad.”

Sirius grinned happily, holding up a finger for Remus to wait, then bound out of the room. Remus was left sat on the bed, doubting himself, wondering what the bloody fuck he thought he was getting up to. Never mind Sirius actually seemed eager to spend this sort of time with him. It was clear Sirius enjoyed flirting with people, and he was eccentric, so there was a chance this was just his typical behaviour.

Yet the tiny traitor who lived in Remus’ brain wanted to insist it was something else. Something special. Maybe an eccentric, gorgeous, _interesting_ person like Sirius Black might find something he enjoyed in the stodgy, rude loner that was Remus Lupin.

He only had a handful of minutes to really mull it over, though. Sirius was returned with an armful of unopened crisp bags, drinks, what looked like brightly coloured packets of sweets, and one of the largest bars of chocolate Remus had ever seen.

Sirius caught him eyeing it, and grinned. “It’s dark chocolate with marzipan. James brought it back when he went on holiday with Lily a few weeks ago.” He banged it over to Remus who inspected the packaging. “Also turkish delights, if you’re keen.” He banged down a tin of them. Remus glanced down and saw they were the rose flavoured ones—which he adored and hadn’t tasted in ages.

“Well, bit of a feast, this.”

Sirius grinned as he climbed back onto the bed, now sitting even closer to Remus, their shoulders nearly touching. He spread the rest of the food out, then set his laptop up on his large physics book. “Punishment for being dreadful and un co-operative,” Sirius said, pointing a finger at the book.

Remus laughed a little, covering the noise with his sleeve. “Right.”

“Well,” Sirius gave a shrug, then grinned widely. “Anyway, what sort of film do you fancy?”

“Not fussed,” Remus said. “Prefer something we can put captions on. It can be really hard for me to follow. Er…and I’m not overly fond of gore or horror.”

“Right.” Sirius went through his list and eventually pointed to the screen. “Addams Family?”

“First or second?” Remus asked with a small smile.

Sirius preened. “Both. We could marathon. Have a proper sleep-over even. It’ll be ages before this lot clears out and we’ve got supplies now.”

Remus knew he ought to say no. And yet that tiny traitor was speaking for him again. “Yeah alright. I might nip home after but…marathon it is.”

Sirius clapped his hands together as he started the film, then switched on the captions. “Tell you what, why not let me have a go at those questions. At least I can do the answers to them, then we can sort out the whole, making it look less like I filled out a facebook quiz.”

Remus laughed, then dug into his pack for the new questions he’d printed out. All he’d really done was modify the verbiage, so it wasn’t overly gender-specific. He had a feeling Gideon would end up being a git and refuse to print it, but that didn’t matter.

“D’you mind?” Remus asked after a moment. He motioned to his processor, and Sirius frowned. “If I take it off?”

“Oh er. Well no, of course not. But how will we you know…I mean…” Sirius then brightened. “I could write. Notes, you know?”

Remus smiled, the expression softening his face, and he nodded. “Yeah, alright.” He pushed his beanie back off, then turned the processor off and set it aside. The world faded immediately into almost complete silence, save for a few background tones his hearing aid picked up. Slipping the hat back on his head, he grinned over at Sirius and gave him a thumbs up.

Sirius looked only vaguely uncomfortable, a small blush across his cheeks, but he nudged Remus with his elbow and they settled in. 

As Sirius scribbled away at the pages, Remus watched the captions flow across the screen. He’d always loved the Addams Family. He found the love between them genuine, and if he was being overly romantic about it, a bit inspiring. Not that Remus would ever admit that to anyone. Ever.

Feeling a nudge to his ribs, Remus glanced over and saw Sirius holding out a turkish delight toward Remus. The small, pink sweet sat in the centre of his palm, and Remus picked it up between his fingers, grinning.

Sirius flipped the interview page over and scribbled onto the back, **Alright?**

“Very,” Remus said, feeling the words vibrate in the back of his throat. “You?”

Sirius nodded, giving another thumbs up, then he scribbled, **D’you sign?**

Remus nodded. “I do, but I’ve only picked it up fairly recently. Not fluent, and I’ve only just got involved with any of the Deaf Community so it needs a lot of work.”

**Why?**

“Why what?”

**D’you only just know how to sign. Rude, I know. Hit me if I’m being dreadful.**

Remus snorted. “I would never hit you. And well, I went Deaf as a baby, and my parents didn’t know anything about it, so they just sort of…went with this option when they were able. I was five. I was in speech therapy for years and years, and it wasn’t until I got to University that I realised I didn’t want to identify as hearing.”

Sirius seemed to ponder this, his elegant face playing across several emotions, and Remus realised he’d make a brilliant signer with how expressive he was. It brought him back to watching him during his cheer routine. Everything, every emotion, every move, was splayed out raw and open right there on his face.

**Can you sign something to me? You don’t have to translate. Just like to see it.**

Remus shrugged, then lifted his hands and with careful motions told Sirius, ‘You beautiful. You wonderful. Want kiss, but scared. Want date maybe, but think you say no.’

Sirius’ face lit up and he shook his head a little. **That’s pretty beautiful, you know. Are there classes I could learn? Then you wouldn’t have to keep your thing in. Obvs you hate it. And my hand’s getting tired.**

Remus felt his laugh bubble from his chest, and he reached out in spite of his nerves, giving Sirius’ wrist a squeeze. “Aye, there are plenty of BSL classes. And I’ll be a nice boy and put my processor back on after the film, alright?”

Sirius rewarded him with a shining grin, and when Remus tried to pull his hand away, Sirius kept it there. Feeling his breath catch in his chest, Remus turned his gaze back to the film, but noticed absolutely nothing in the world except those long, elegant fingers playing with his own. Sirius’ slightly longer nails raked gently, teasingly, across the lines of his palm. They traced round each finger, each knuckle, almost absently. Reverently. Remus swallowed thickly, wanting more, wanting something, but stamped it all down into his gut.

His eyes were on the screen, but he lost time.

He was very nearly startled when the credits began to roll, and he glanced over to see Sirius watching him with heavy-lidded eyes. Pulling his hand away very carefully, Remus put his beanie off to the side, and put his processor back on. When the world flooded back to noise, he winced a little, and let out a sigh.

“You look tired,” he told Sirius.

Sirius blinked slowly, then shrugged. “A bit. You still want to nip home? I mean, I don’t mind sharing my bed. I know how to behave myself.”

Licking his lips, Remus knew he wanted nothing more. But he was anxious. He didn’t have the best track record in relationships and this was so new. He barely knew Sirius at all. “You think that would be a good idea?”

Sirius shrugged, leaning against him a bit. “Unless you don’t like me and I’m reading this completely wrong, Re.”

Remus startled at the nickname, but a smile bloomed across his face. “I like you just fine, you know. Even if I don’t really know you.”

“Oh well, that’s easy to solve.” Sirius moved away, splaying himself downward against his pillows, and kicked his feet into Remus’ lap. “Ask me anything.”

Remus blinked, then shrugged. “Siblings?”

“One brother. Complete fucking git, but overall I think there’s hope for him.”

“So not close, then?”

“Oh very. He’s called Regulus.”

Remus stared, then laughed. “Regulus and Sirius. Honestly?”

“Longstanding tradition. My father’s called Orion.”

“Bloody hell,” Remus said from behind a giggle. “Alright well, erm. What did you get your A-levels in?”

Sirius snorted. “Really? You want my marks as well?”

“Curious.”

“I took five. I got As in everything. And I did so without showing up to half my lectures because I’m a genius.” Sirius grinned at him as Remus rolled his eyes. “Anyway I took Physics—obviously. Chemistry, Biology, Physical Education, and Latin.”

Remus’ eyes went wide. “Latin?”

Sirius shrugged. “It’s better than James. He got an A-level in Hindi which I will maintain until my _dying_ day is bloody cheating as it was his first language.”

Remus threw his head back and laughed. “I can’t believe he got away with it.”

“Well his accent is posh. He convinced them that he stopped speaking it at two. Fucking wanker.” Sirius leant up a bit and winked. “Alright, out with yours, then.”

Remus scrubbed a hand down his face. “Well, I took four, and I got three As and a B. Creative Writing, Classics, Art History, and Sociology.” Remus shrugged. “They didn’t really have a decent journalism option.”

“Is that what you want then?” Sirius asked. “To go be some journalist?”

“No,” Remus said. “I want to teach, but I think it’s a bit fun. Though Gideon is a sodding twat and this year has been dead miserable.” He leant over a little, and to his surprised, Sirius grabbed his wrist and yanked him down toward the pillows. Giving up fighting Sirius, Remus shifted so they were laying side-by-side. “But I’d like to teach English. But I’ve been thinking I’d like to teach at a Deaf school, you know? Literature and classics.”

“Art History?” Sirius asked, giving him a nudge.

Remus laughed a bit. “Well no. I happen to like art. It’s a hobby.”

Sirius perked up. “You can draw? Like what? Animals, minerals? People?”

“People, mostly,” Remus said, feeling his cheeks go a bit hot.

Sirius was all-but bouncing. “Oh show me. Go on. Show me something you’ve done.”

Remus licked his lips, then realised in his book he did, in fact, have the sketch he’d done of Sirius. He wondered what Sirius might think of it. Would he be pleased? Or possibly massively creeped out he’d been watched.

Sitting up, Remus reached for his pack and pulled out his sketch book. “I like to people watch. I go to a park some mornings and watch people going about their morning. Joggers and nannies with their charges and people hurrying off to work in smart clothes and harried faces.” Remus touched the top of the book, but didn’t open it. “In fact, just the day before I spotted this gorgeous person who was going for a run. I was captivated, so I had to draw them.”

Sirius was grinning eagerly. “Show me. Go on.”

Licking his lips, Remus let out a breath, then flipped to the page he’d done of Sirius. He hesitated, then handed it over and waited. His eyes closed for a second, anticipating the worst.

“But…” Sirius was staring down at it, his expression for the first time, unreadable. “But. This is me.”

Remus nodded. “I didn’t know it was you. Imagine my surprise when I showed up for your interview and there you were.”

Sirius swallowed. “But this is really good, Re. Really…I mean…looks just like me.”

Remus couldn’t read his tone, nor could he read the blank expression. “If it bothers you, I am sorry. I don’t mean to invade someone’s space when…”

His words were cut off when Sirius launched himself at Remus. This time he distinctly felt lips pressing kisses along Remus’ neck. They were chaste, close-mouthed, and so warm. “It’s great,” Sirius breathed.

Remus pulled away. “Sorry?”

With a small flush, Sirius pushed his fringe back away from his forehead. “I said it’s great. It’s…wow. Really good. You could be a professional if you wanted.”

Remus looked down, feeling a bit shy suddenly, and reached for the book. “Well, my lines are sloppy and I don’t put a lot of work into it, you know? And that field is hard to get into. I’m poor enough as it is, I don’t really want to work harder at having no money.” He hesitated, then tore the page from his book and handed it over. “It’s yours though. Seeing as it’s you.”

Sirius took it, the look on his face saying it was something he considered precious, and Remus felt his stomach go a bit wobbly. After a second, he snapped out of his reverie and scrambled from the bed. He spun in a circle in the centre of the room, then let out an, “Aha,” as he raced to the wall, and with a finesse, he attached the drawing to the wall prominently with a bit of sellotape at the corners.

“Well?” he demanded, looking back at Remus.

With a small flush, Remus shrugged. “Perfect.”

Sirius preened then hopped back onto the bed and dragged Remus down with him. Flinging an arm round his waist, he laid face-to-face with him and smiled. “Please stay. I’d…I mean okay we don’t know each other but I think you’re really great.”

Unable to stop himself, Remus lifted a hand and traced it along Sirius’ cut jaw. The bones were prominent, his skin extremely soft, and Remus let out the barest sigh. “I’m mad for saying yes, you know. I never…I mean never do this.”

“Neither do I,” Sirius said with a giggle. “Ask James, if you don’t believe me. I hate people. Hate them.”

“Not overly fond of a lot of them, myself,” Remus admitted.

Sirius’ tongue darted out, pink and wet across his bottom lip. “So what a pair we make. I think you’re fantastic, Re. And maybe this is backward and all upside down and wonky things, but I’d like to ask you on a date as well. This weekend. I’ve got the cheer competition on Friday, but I’m free Saturday. To be all yours.”

Remus blushed hard, and found himself nodding. “Alright. So long as you promise to help me with my paper, because whilst this might be horribly unethical to be dating your subject, I rather like you and well…I think I’d love to go on a date.”

Sirius went a bit soggy about the mouth, then cleared his throat. “Can I kiss you a little?”

Remus nodded, and closed his eyes because it made the contact feel that much better. It was a little wet, but chaste. Sirius’ hand tightened on his hip a bit, but nothing untoward. It was just…comfortable. And that, Remus realised, was something he hadn’t felt in a very, very long time.

*** 

Something woke him, and for a second, Remus had forgotten where he was. Peering his eye over at the glowing clock, he saw it read 1.37. There was a faint desklamp on, and Remus wondered first how he’d managed to fall asleep, and second why there was noise.

Then he remembered Sirius who was sat up next to him clicking away on the laptop. The noise, however, had come from the door. Remus peered over to see James stood there with a confused expression.

“Remus?”

Sirius glanced over and smiled as Remus attempted to sit up. “Sorry I er…must have drifted.”

“No worries, mate,” James said. “I thought you’d slipped out, but Marls said she spotted you and this tosser here snuggling like a couple of teenagers as she and Dori went out. She didn’t want to bother you.”

Remus’ face heated up a little, and he scrubbed it with his palm. “Er. Bloody hell. Sirius asked me to stay.”

“He’s excellent, excellent inspiration. I’m at the very end of my paper and it’s bloody brilliant.”

James grinned a little. “Alright well, I guess I’ll see you both in the morning. I’ll be up early for a run so I’ll fix breakfast.”

“Oh no you,” Remus began, but James’ stern look cut off his protests.

“Don’t bother,” Sirius said in a bored tone. “He’ll do it anyway, and it’s less hassle if you don’t argue about it.”

“Too right,” James said with a nod. “Your face alright?”

Remus prod at his jaw and though it was sore, he reckoned without that cream he’d have been much worse. “Yeah, actually. I er…thanks.”

“No worries. I’ve told Lily about it, so if they give you any shit in your lecture, we’ll handle it.”

Remus swallowed, not wanting to make trouble. He’d had enough of it in his day being the weird Deaf kid with the funny accent and strange eating habits, and always poorly. He was no stranger to bullies. It hadn’t got any easier when he discovered he wasn’t straight, and he didn’t anticipate it ever getting better.

“I’ll be alright,” he said eventually.

He expected James to leave then, but instead the taller man crawled across the bed, grabbing Sirius by the chin and planting a firm kiss on his mouth. Sirius turned his face up and into it, as though he expected it, and gave a happy hum, stroking one hand along James’ shoulder.

“Night, love,” James said very softly.

“Night,” Sirius replied, then went right back to work.

James turned to Remus, then gave him a very gentle brush of fingers along his cheek. “You as well. If you need anything, Lily and I are just upstairs.” And finally he was gone.

Remus turned to look at Sirius who was engrossed in his final lines. But the cheerleader seemed to notice something amiss, and stopped what he was doing.

“Alright, Re?”

“James kissed you.”

Sirius blinked in confusion, then let out a small laugh. “Oh. Yeah. It’s not…I mean, it’s not romantic. I’m…I like it. Affection.”

Whatever knot had settled into Remus’ gut immediately unclenched. “Ah. No that’s…I was just…” He cleared his throat. “I’m shit at relationships, but I do know I don’t like sharing. Romantically, that is.”

Sirius’ grin softened a bit. “James is my brother. Well not literally, but I love him most in the whole world and it’s…how we express it.”

Remus reached over, dragging his hand along the side of Sirius’ exposed thigh. “I get it. It’s fine. It just startled me is all. If we you know, make a proper go at this, I’m not going to ask you to stop. I like James.”

Sirius, if possible, brightened even more. “Well good. And it’s not like he’d do it to you if you didn’t want, but expect him to try a bit. He’s really touchy-feely, that one. Goes against both his British and Indian sides, believe me. His parents thing it’s right hilarious.”

Remus allowed himself a small chuckle as he settled back against the pillows. He was exhausted, and his head was beginning to hurt from the noise. “Do you mind if I go silent?”

Sirius frowned, then said, “Oh. No of course not. I’ll be done soon, I promise. If I need you shall I just…er?”

“Tap me,” Remus said. “But I’m shattered so might take a minute.”

“Go on. Sleep. We can get up to whatever funny business we like in the morning.”

Remus rather liked that prospect, and with another fond look at Sirius, he turned his implant off, removed the aid along with it, and settled in for the night.

He wasn’t sure how long it was before the lights went out. He was barely aware of it. All he knew was that sometime after, a warm arm settled around him, pulling him tight, and soft breath ghosting along his neck lulled him back to sleep.

 

*** 

Dashing down the stairs and into the kitchen, Sirius skid to a halt at the counter. Lily was sat there with the morning paper and a cuppa, and he grabbed one of the lower chairs and plonked it in front of her. “Plait, please,” he begged.

With a feigned sigh of annoyance, she urged him backward a bit more, and her fingers began to card through his freshly washed hair. Glancing down, she saw him wearing an off the shoulder, grey crop-top and a pair of black leggings. “Those aren’t mine, are they?”

“No, love,” he defended. “Got them on a sale just last week.”

She eyed the top, then shrugged. “Not like I can remember anymore what I bloody own. You look very pretty today though. It doesn’t have anything to do with that gorgeous little hipster in your bed, does it?”

“I have no gorgeous hipster in my bed,” Sirius replied as he tipped his head back so she could start the plait near his fringe. “I have a gorgeous hipster in the shower.”

“Christ,” she muttered, but she was smiling. Her hands twisted and wove his delicate locks down his back, then she held her hand out. “Tie, please.”

He handed it over, and as she twisted it onto the end, he leant his head against the counter with a sigh. “I like him. I mean I really fancy him, Lils. I’m a little freaked out.”

Lily brushed her hands over the plait to make sure it was secure, then urged him back up to put the chair away. “If it helps, I’ve been in lectures with him all term and he seems like a really good sort. No drama, so your reigning crown of drama champion is under no threat. And I’ve not seen him ever be problematic.”

Sirius looked hopeful, and felt it blooming in his chest. “We snuggled all night. And I’ve not done that since…well… I can’t remember.”

“Our bed not counting, I assume,” James said as he came into the kitchen holding a vine of ripe tomatoes. Stopping to press a kiss to the corner of Sirius’ mouth, he moved to the cutting board and began to slice them. “But you looked peaceful.”

“Did you peer in on us, you bloody voyeuristic git?”

James shrugged. “I’m protective. Is he awake?”

“Yeah. He’s having a shower right now, then he’ll be down.” Sirius leant the front of his body over the counter to steal a drink of Lily’s tea. “You like him, yeah?”

“Don’t much know him, but I appreciate the way he went after that fucking berk who was chatting shit,” James said. “Bloody brave, chap, he was. That fuck must have been double Remus’ size.”

Lily’s face was dark with rage. “I’d have torn him limb from limb.”

“I know love,” James said fondly. “I’ve already got dad on call in case he wants to pull something like that again. I’ll bring a discrimination suit down on his head so fast, he’ll be slapped with a sentence before he realises his arse is being dragged to court.”

Sirius grinned at James. “Well anyway, back to _me_.”

“Of bloody course,” Lily said with a laugh. “Have you two had anything proper yet? Even plans for anything proper?”

“Well I’ve never been one for boring old rules like proper,” Sirius said, waving his hand. “But yes. We’ve a date on Saturday. I’m also going to invite him to shadow me on Friday before the competition so he can get his sodding paper finished. Then he can pay me more attention.”

“Christ, he has no idea what he’s getting into,” Lily said. She rose and gave Sirius’ cheek a pat. “I’m going upstairs to get ready. I’ve got a shift at the hospital at ten. Will you be home?”

“Practise late into the day, but I’ll be back for tea,” Sirius said.

Just as she was going up, Sirius heard a second set of footsteps as Remus came down. He was in the same clothes as last night, but was freshly cleaned and looked rested. He had a timid smile on his face, and when he turned, Sirius could see the light bruising on his jaw which sent a wave of rage through him.

Stamping it down, he jumped up from the counter and rushed over to place a kiss to the corner of Remus’ mouth. “Morning.”

Remus grinned, putting his hands on Sirius’ hips. His cool fingers met Sirius’ bare skin above the waistband of the leggings, and Remus gave Sirius a slow, appraising look. “Morning.” Remus’ hands went up, dragging along the plait in his hair. “That’s lovely. Lily’s handiwork?”

Sirius grinned. “She’s the best at them. Course your ridiculous mop would be hopeless.”

Remus ran his fingers into his curls and shook his head a bit. A few, stray drops of water splashed Sirius in the face and he giggled. “I’ve always been a bit hopeless.”

“You and me both, mate,” James called, ruffling his own untidy mess. “We can have a club. People with too nice locks like Sirius and Lily aren’t invited.”

“Don’t you dare,” Sirius warned, and James grinned at him. “You’d never have any fun without me, anyway. Boring old messy hair club.”

Remus seemed amused by the pout, and reached up with two fingers, pressing them to the corner of Sirius’ mouth. “Cute.” 

Sirius wrinkled his nose a bit, but couldn’t stop the wash of affection in his chest. “No you. Anyway Jamie’s got breakfast almost sorted. You’re vegan, right? So no eggs. But there’s fruit and toast and some of Jamie’s mum’s homemade blackberry jam. Oh and tomatoes.”

“Sounds lovely,” Remus said. He followed Sirius to the counter where James laid out all the food, and the three of them tucked in.

Lily came down a little while later, grabbing a bit of toast, then a kiss for Sirius and James, then a fond ruffle of Remus’ curls. “Laterz. Love you all.”

Remus smiled after her, then turned back to Sirius and James. “I ought to head back myself. I have a few things to get done before my shift tonight.”

Sirius pushed away from the table and swiped the back of his hand across his mouth to get rid of any toast crumbs. “Can I give you a ride?”

Remus lifted a brow. “You’ve a car?”

“Er. Well…”

A motorbike, and Remus looked a bit nervous as they stood at the kerb. “I promise, I’m very safe,” Sirius said, tapping the edge of his motorbike boot on the pavement. “I’ll go slow.”

Remus hesitated, then shrugged. “Yeah, alright. Why not.”

Sirius lit up at the thought of Remus clinging to him tight as they drove through the streets. The address he’d given wasn’t far, a ten minute ride at most depending on the traffic. He offered up his spare helmet to Remus, then slid on, urging the hipster to climb behind him.

“Just hold on tight. Gets a bit loud so if you want to switch off, you can.”

Remus hesitated, then shook his head. “Rather be able to hear you if you need to warn me.”

Sirius swivelled round as best he could, and tugged on the front of Remus’ jumper. “Kiss?”

Remus grinned, then obliged, putting a palm to Sirius’ cheek as their lips pressed together. “Keep me safe?”

“Of course.” Sirius then switched on, loving the rumbling feeling as the bike roared to life. Remus grabbed him tight about the waist, and Sirius kicked up the stand, taking off at a much slower than usual pace. Navigating the streets, he wound through cars and eventually pulled up to his building. Sirius had been there a few times, visiting Marlene and Dori when they first moved in, but long before Remus had come to live with them.

Now all the parties were held at theirs, with a more roomy area and the chance for Sirius to escape should he get overwhelmed.

Rumbling to a halt, Sirius put the stand down and waited for Remus to dismount before easing himself to the pavement. He took the helmet, tucking it into the bike’s storage, then reached out and grabbed the sleeve of Remus’ jumper. He tugged him over, and palmed Remus’ cheek.

“You’re lovely. Can’t wait to see you again.”

Remus grinned, pressing his cheek into Sirius’ palm. “Soon. Promise.”

“Shadowing me tomorrow?” Sirius asked. He drew his finger in a line along Remus’ bottom lip, and smiled when Remus’ breath came out a hot puff of air.

“I…er. Yes.”

“Can I kiss you again? Proper kiss?”

“What kind of tart do you think I am?” Remus asked, even as he stepped closer. Lifting his head, he took a fistful of Sirius’ top and yanked him down.

It was the first real, proper kiss they shared, and oh it felt good. Sirius’ knees went a bit weak, and he gripped the tops of Remus’ shoulders to steady himself as the warm mouth moved on his. First it was just lips, then a gentle swiping of the tongue. Then Sirius parted for more and they began to explore each other.

Remus tasted well…Remus-ly. All sort of bitter tea and leftover jam. He felt the fist clenching his shirt hold even tighter, and something deep inside begged him not to let go. But eventually, it had to end. He didn’t pull back straight away. Instead, he leant his forehead to Remus’ and breathed him in.

“Fuck. I really fancy you.”

“I know,” Remus said, his voice deeper and a bit uneven. “Will it offend you if I say I’m a bit nervous? Just how much I like you?”

“No,” Sirius breathed. “I feel the same. But I also don’t want to stop. Just…don’t hurt me, okay?”

Remus pulled back, his eyes a bit tight. “I can promise to do everything my power, alright? But I’m not perfect. I’m no good with people most of the time and I…”

“Re,” Sirius said. “I know. I’m the same. I just…this could be something good, don’t you think.”

Remus took a step back, and seemed to struggle with letting Sirius go. “Yeah. I do.” He then smiled shyly, looking at Sirius through lowered lashes. “Text me later. And I can’t wait to see you.”

Sirius didn’t say anything until Remus was in the building, then he turned to his bike and muttered, “I miss you already.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Up next will be the final chapter with- cheer competition, the article, the gender studies paper, and Sirius and Remus' first date.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if I hadn't stopped here, it would have gone on for ages, and I still have an epic tonne of prompts to finish. So I had to stop. However I'll be adding a series tag in this fic eventually to do a sequel because I really love the characters. This chapter is more fluffy than I ever really intended to write--but I couldn't help it. These Wolfstar lil shits do this to me and I can't seem to help it.
> 
> Anyway I hope this fulfilled the prompt well enough and everyone's pleased with the ending. xx Look for updates on my MWPP fic soon-ish. Though getting into the second war is more difficult and the chapters are taking ages, so updates will probably be far less frequent. But more fics are coming.

**I was thinking. I reckon you’re at lectures or work. I’m at a lecture and getting the evil eye from my prof. But I’m bored.**

**But I was thinking, darling. If you really want to properly shadow me and write a proper essay on the glory that is my life. You ought to sleep here tonight. Then you can wake up with me. Re. Reeeeemus.**

**Reminius.**

**Re.**

**Hallo.**

Remus didn’t get to his mobile until his break, which he then found the texts and had a good laugh out back as he was getting some distance from customers who seemed to all be against him that day. He’d had a long day of lectures, feeling overwhelmed by how much work was due within the next few weeks, and though he ought to stay at home and study, Sirius’ offer was too tempting.

_Will you show me terrible superhero films and feed me popcorn?_

As though Sirius had been waiting by his mobile, the return text was almost immediate. **I promise to fill you with delicious treats and terrible films and well…anything you want, really ;)**

_Oh that was a bad line, Sirius. You should be ashamed. Will you pick me up? My shift is over at 17.30_

**Ah my ray of sunshine, I will be there.**

_I prefer the moon to the sun. Anyway this is the address. See you soon._

Sirius sent a rapid-fire series of texts full of emoticons Remus didn’t have a prayer of deciphering, so instead he slipped his mobile into his pocket and felt lighter as he walked back into the café to make drinks for the rest of his shift.

There was only an hour and a half left, and Sirius turned up fifteen minutes before Remus’ time was up. He happened to show up just as one of Remus’ more obnoxious customers was harassing him about the drink he’d just made.

“Now, I know you’ve made this twice, but I’ve tasted it again and I’m pretty sure it’s not soy,” she said, pushing a lock of white hair off her shoulders. “Now maybe you can’t hear me, and I can write it down, if you like.”

Remus clenched his jaw. “I can hear you just fine. And I’ve made it with soy both times. However if you’d like to stay here at the counter and you can watch me…”

“I just think,” she said, raising her voice, “I should write it down.”

Remus gulped, fighting off the urge to start screaming profanity in her face. Instead he plastered on a smile and shoved the small notepad and biro at her. With a strained grin, she wrote the word SOY, and underlined it three times. 

“Does that make sense now?”

Remus swallowed. “Yes. Soy. As I said before, I understood you. But I’ll make it again. With soy.” Just as he started to turn away, he spotted Sirius leant against the pastry counter watching the exchange with a small frown.

“Nearly done,” he called out. His heart gave a little flutter at the sight of the cheerleader. He was wearing tight jeans with careful rips all along the front, and a loose t-shirt with a screen-print that said, ‘I’d Rather Be A Memaid’. Over that he had on a leather jacket, and his motorbike boots completed the outfit.

Remus swore each time he saw Sirius, he got more and more attractive. However that was possible.

Forcing himself to turn away, he remade the latte with soy, for the third time. Taking care to leave the soy container out on the counter for the fussy woman to see, he completed the drink, faked his smile once more, and pushed it toward her.

“There you are. Double shot, _soy_ latte, no foam.”

She sipped it, then gave him a nod. “Ah yes. See I thought so. I thought there was a mistake before. Thank you.”

Remus blinked, watching her turn and walk off before he ripped his apron away from his waist and shoved it hard under the counter. Grabbing his jumper and beanie, he quickly moved to the till and punched in his code to clock out.

He held up his index finger to Sirius, poking his head through the back door and called out, “I’m leaving. Laterz.”

He thought he heard a muffled goodbye, or a muffled something, but he didn’t care what it was. He was round the counter, grabbing Sirius by the wrist, and tugging him out of the café.

“Bloody hell, I was about to lose it,” Remus breathed.

Sirius stopped them, giving Remus a small push against the brick side of the building. His long, thin fingers came up to Remus’ face, tracing a line there. In the corner of his eye, Remus caught a flash of bright purple polish covered in flecks of reflective silver.

Wholly distracted by the warm hand, Remus muttered, “Glitter.”

Sirius’ eyebrow went up. “Sorry?”

Blinking, Remus cleared his throat. “Your nails. Have erm. Glitter.”

Looking down at his other hand, Sirius laughed and then gripped Remus by the waist, putting his nose right into Remus’ curls. “Oh. That’s the smell.”

“Huh?” Remus asked, a bit heady and dizzy from the close proximity of Sirius. “The smell?”

“It was _all over_ my pillow,” Sirius breathed, then placed a very soft, careful kiss just under Remus’ earlobe. “I buried myself in it last night. It’s the smell of you, and the café.”

Remus flushed. “Oh. Er. I’m here a lot.”

The warm fingers still touching his cheek moved south, cupping his shoulder gently. “Can I kiss you? Been thinking about it all day. Got shouted at in two lectures because I couldn’t pay attention.”

Remus started to laugh until he realised Sirius had just asked for a kiss, and it died in his throat. Giving a shy nod, Remus’ eyes wandered down to the ground as Sirius tipped his chin and pressed their lips together. It was far less chaste than they had been before, but not getting too deep just yet. It was just enough to make Remus shiver.

“Mmm,” Sirius breathed.

Remus did laugh this time, bringing his fingers up to Sirius’ chest, just under his throat. “I love your voice. I can feel it.”

Sirius looked slightly surprised, but grinned. “Really?”

“It’s very nice. Most of the time people sound wonky in this thing.” Remus reached up to gently flick at his processor. “Bit tinny, though I don’t have anything to compare it to. But they always sound wrong. Except you. Because I can feel you here.” He pressed his fingers harder into Sirius’ skin.

Sirius met his eyes, the look a bit sappy and sweet. “Well that’s good. I like that. Being unique.”

“Of course you do,” Remus said. “You’re a narcissist after all.”

Rolling his eyes, Sirius grabbed Remus’ hand and yanked him forward. “Git. Come on, let’s get back to mine. Jamie’s ordered a veritable feast from somewhere—I didn’t ask. Lily’s just come off a long shift, so it’ll be a nice quiet evening. We can snuggle and do homework and be swotty and boring and adorable.”

Remus chuckled as he let Sirius drag him to the bike, and was rewarded with another soft kiss, and the helmet he’d used before. Climbing behind Sirius, he held on tight, letting his face bury into the back of Sirius’ soft hair. The bike rumbled and roared, and he felt the tug on his gut as it lurched forward.

Each curve round a corner, each stop and go, Remus squeezed just a little more. Sometimes he’d feel Sirius’ shoulders shaking up and down with a little laugh, and he was sure he looked absolutely ridiculous, but he didn’t care. It felt nice.

The café wasn’t far from Sirius’ flat, though, and before long they were putting the bike at the kerb and locking the helmet up. Sirius palmed his keys in one hand, taking Remus’ fingers in the other, and they headed in.

The main sitting lounge was upstairs, but they paused in Sirius’ room so Remus could bang his things down on the bed. “I have to work on your interview tonight at some point.”

Sirius nodded, then took slow, careful steps toward Remus. The door shut suddenly behind him, and Remus found himself pressed with his back to the sturdy wood. “Am I coming on too strong?” The question was innocent, Sirius’ eyes wide and honest.

Remus found his head shaking. “Er no. Normally I think I might say yes, but I just can’t get enough of you.” His hands came up absently as Sirius closed the distance between them. Gently he carded through Sirius’ dark hair as Sirius leant in to snuffle along his neck.

“You should sleep over all the time so my pillows never lose that smell.”

Remus let out a nervous laugh. “Should I?”

“Mmm, yes please.” Sirius kissed along the hot skin, and Remus felt himself _burning_. “I fancy you so much.”

Remus let his eyes close as Sirius spoke, feeling the words against his skin, the low hum in Sirius’ chest as it was pressed against his. “Feeling seems to be mutual.”

Sirius laughed again, then lifted his face. One, thin finger traced Remus’ bottom lip. “Can I give you a proper snog?”

“Yes.” Remus licked his lips, but stopped Sirius with a palm to his chest. “Also, it’s okay if you just kiss me. I’ll…I mean if I don’t want it, I’ll tell you. But I like you a rather lot.”

Something flashed in Sirius’ eyes, then he dipped his head and their lips crashed together. Hard. Sirius’ fingers fisted tight in the front of Remus’ jumper, holding him there as tongues tangled together. Remus let out a low moan as their hips slotted together at just the right angle and Remus could feel his own hardness pressed against Sirius’.

“Shit,” Remus breathed. “I…unf.”

“Too fast,” Sirius whispered. “We should wait. A bit. Yeah?”

Remus nodded, letting the spinning in his head stop a bit. “Yeah I reckon. I reckon we should.”

Sirius backed up a little, but his fingers continued to press to the slightly tender side of Remus’ jaw. The bruising wasn’t too bad, and honestly Sirius’ fingers were the most soothing thing Remus had ever felt in his life. He licked his lips, and let out a shaking breath.

“Too much?” Sirius asked very quietly.

Remus shook his head. “No I…” He let out a small laugh. “I fancy you so much it scares me a bit, I think.”

Sirius pursed his lips, then drew his hand down Remus’ shoulder, to his wrist, then twinned their fingers together. “Same. So let’s go be a couple of scared gits together, yeah? James will be back with the take-away and we can put on a film and you can be swotty on your laptop with your article.”

“Okay,” he said with a soppy grin.

Sirius didn’t let Remus go as he rummaged through his pack for the interview questions Sirius had filled out, and his laptop. He was pulled then down the hall and into a lounge with two sofas, a couple of armchairs and a ridiculously sized telly against the wall.

“This is my favourite sofa,” Sirius said, nodding to the brown one which looked a bit like it was made from a fluffy bathroom towel. He nodded for Remus to sit, and it was so comfortable he let out a groan. Sirius giggled, pulling the afghan from the back and putting it across Remus’ lap. “Snuggle up. I need to go put something else on besides jeans. You okay to wait?”

Remus nodded. “Go on. I’m not going anywhere.”

Sirius bound out of the room with a flourish, and Remus quickly booted up his laptop. Pulling up the article he’d been working on earlier, he got comfortable when a noise startled him. He looked up to see James stood in the doorway, his arms full of several paper sacks.

“Remus?” He sounded a little surprised.

“Er. Hi. Sirius said uhm…”

“He talked you into staying over,” James finished for him with a slight chuckle. “I expected him to. It’s hard to tell that one no.”

Remus felt his cheeks heat up a bit, and he shrugged. “D’you need a hand?”

“Nah. I’ve got it. Peckish at all? I’ve gotten a feast on Sirius’ orders. Greek, Indian, and Chinese. He begged for pizza as well but I had to draw the line somewhere.”

Remus laughed. “Well, anything vegan?”

“Only most of it,” James said with a wide grin. “I’m vegetarian so you’re in friendly company.” He sat on the floor near the sofa and began to unpack. “Lily should be home soon from her shift. Might be a bit cranky so I may abandon you two. But I reckon Sirius will keep you company enough.”

As if on cue, Sirius bounded back into the lounge. He was now clad in a white t-shirt with black letters that said, ‘I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry,’ which made Remus snicker into his sleeve. His bottoms were a soft purple, silky material with a bit of ruffling round the cuffs. He had his hair pulled back into a messy bun high against the back of his head. Remus found him suddenly so attractive, his fingers and toes went a bit numb.

Sirius seemed to notice the look on Remus’ face and he sat down. “Alright?”

Remus blinked, then cleared his throat. “Er. Yes. Nice erm…bottoms.”

Sirius’ face went blank, his eyes shuttering off a bit. “Oh er well…” He cleared his throat. “They’re comfy.”

“They’re gorgeous,” Remus breathed, unable to stop himself. He reached out and dragged his finger along Sirius’ thigh. “You’re…” He stopped, glancing at James who had the look about his face like he was trying not to listen, but couldn’t help it. Remus felt his face go hot again. “Beautiful,” he finally said.

Whatever Sirius had been thinking, the caution fell away, and he shot Remus a smile which could light a room. “Oh. Well…thank you.”

“Alright food first, flirting after,” James instructed. He pat the ground, and Sirius grabbed Remus by the wrist, pulling him to the floor.

They made a bit of a picnic about it, flimsy plastic plates and everything. James had beer and water, Remus taking the latter, and before long they were enjoying their strange but rather delicious feast.

“Shall I put something on?” James asked once everyone had tucked in.

Sirius looked at Remus who shrugged. “It’s always a bit hard for me to follow without erm…” He gestured upward at his implant.

Sirius gave him a small grin. “Let’s wait.”

They fell into comfortable conversation after, James first whinging about his practise and how his mates wouldn’t just bloody listen for once—and they’d win if they would just pay attention. Sirius whinged a bit about his upcoming paper, though boasting a little about how quickly he’d gone through his physics—no small part to Remus keeping him company, he added.

“And I saw how your day was going,” Sirius told Remus as James collected the now-empty plates. “Right bint, she was.”

Remus shrugged. “Happens.”

James frowned. “What happens?”

Sirius explained the story a bit. “I didn’t catch the whole thing, but the end of it was enough.”

Remus let out a sigh. “People make assumptions. Sometimes they think I’ve been given the job as an act of charity or something. They assume by my voice or if they see this,” he tapped his hearing aid, “I can’t actually understand them. Some take advantage. And some people are just fucking idiots.”

James’ face was dark. “That’s absurd.”

Remus shrugged. “It is what it is. Reckon it’ll happen less once I’m finished with my degree and teach at a Deaf school. If I get that sort of treatment there well…there’s no hope for the world.”

James blinked, then laughed. “Too right, mate.”

Before the conversation could carry on, Lily appeared looking thoroughly harassed with a suspiciously dark stain across her left shoulder. Her expression was drawn, though she managed a smile for both Remus and Sirius.

“I’m about to be very rude and drag James upstairs. Bring food, love. I will see you two in the morning.”

James scrambled to retrieve the food he’d ordered for Lily, giving a quick salute of farewell to the pair. As he left, Sirius leant toward Remus to explain, “She’s working A&E this month and it’s…it gets…”

“I can imagine,” Remus muttered. He smiled when Sirius eased back onto the sofa and pulled Remus with him. They were sat close together, Sirius’ fingers drawing lines up and down Remus’ thigh.

“D’you…I mean…can I ask you something?”

Remus glanced over and saw a faint blush across Sirius’ cheeks. “Yes, anything.”

“Have you ever dated anyone like me?”

Remus felt his lips threatening to curve up into a smile, not because the question was particularly funny, but mostly because there was no one in the world like Sirius. Anywhere. He was certain of it. But he knew what Sirius was getting at. “No,” he said softly, his hand removing Sirius’ from his leg, and twinning their fingers together. His thumb ran along the side of Sirius’ hand. “If you mean anyone who is genderfluid, no. Anyone who is a cheerlearder, no. Anyone who is so ridiculously good looking it makes my toes go numb…no.”

Sirius’ mouth twisted up again into that brilliant smile, and he shook his head. “It just…for a moment seemed like you were a bit put off.” With his free hand, he tugged on the side of his bottoms.

Remus reached out, running his fingers along the soft fabric. “There are moments when I think you can’t look any better, and somehow you can walk out here in pyjamas and I just…I get all…” Remus swallowed. “Flustered.”

“So you don’t mind that I’m…”

Remus turned fully toward him, letting his hand drift up to cup Sirius’ cheek. “Tell me.”

Sirius lowered his eyes. “Thing of it is, most people don’t get it. Even if they _know_ what it means, they think it’s just some funny habit, bloke going round in skirts and frilly tops. Some quirky fancy for lip gloss and nail polish. They don’t…they think it’s a phase or something.”

“I don’t,” Remus said, his voice firm. “I can’t understand, because I’m a cis man, Sirius. So I don’t have the experience, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t respect you. That I don’t fully accept who you tell me that you are. And I’ll never expect you to be different. I’m never going to describe you as a man. Or my…” He stopped, then just went forward with it, “I’ll never call you my _boy_ friend.”

Sirius blinked in surprise. “What would you call me, then?”

“Whatever you want,” Remus said with a small shrug. “So long as it’s mine.”

Sirius’ cheeks went pink again, and with a small noise, he fisted his hand in the front of Remus’ jumper and pulled him in for a kiss. Their lips met, heated for a moment, though not as intense as it had been back in Sirius’ room.

When they parted, Remus smiled and lowered his hands, curving them round Sirius’ ribs. “Who did it?”

Sirius looked away. “No one. Everyone. My parents. My exes. I stopped dating ages ago.”

Knowing he wouldn’t be getting much work done, Remus manoeuvred them to the side so they were laying along the length of the sofa. They snuggled into the throw cushion, Remus taking the afghan from earlier and draping it along their legs. With Sirius tucked into his side, Remus curled his ankle round Sirius’.

“We haven’t even had a date yet, so maybe I’m getting ahead of myself.”

Sirius let out a rather undignified snort. “You and me both.” He held Remus’ hand up, his thumb brushing over the half-moon wrist tattoo. “Pretty.”

“Thanks.” Remus pressed a kiss to Sirius’ temple. “I think if we end up…whatever we end up, the only defining I’ll have to do is my own. Because I thought I was bisexual, but that’s definitely not the case.”

“Does that bother you?” Sirius asked.

Remus laughed a bit. “Not at all. Bloody hell, Sirius, I just can’t believe someone as gorgeous as you would even look twice at me.”

Sirius gave him wide, owlish eyes. “You’re joking, right? I mean, have you looked at yourself?”

“Er, yes,” Remus said, as though that answered the question.

Sirius huffed, then leant his head in to press a kiss to the side of Remus’ neck where he muttered, “You’re a git.”

Remus shoved at him a bit, but was grinning. “Point of it is, I’ve known you all of what, four days? And I’m absurdly happy to know you. I’ve not dated much so I’m…I might not be very good at it but…”

“Well you’re already doing much better than anyone I’ve ever gone out with.” Sirius played with Remus’ fingers for a long moment. “What if I wanted to be your boyfriend sometimes, and your girlfriend sometimes?”

Remus shrugged. “I’m alright with it. Just let me know in the mornings.”

Sirius smiled. “Or if I wanted to just be yours. So people would say, ‘Remus, who is this?’ and you’d just shrug and say…”

“My Sirius,” Remus finished for him.

Sirius made a little happy noise. “Yeah?”

Remus turned Sirius face by his chin and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Yeah.”

*** 

Eventually Remus did have to get work done, as Gideon was expecting the rest of the article sorted and emailed in before midnight. Sirius let him to it, getting some paper and very sparkly pencil with a pom-pom hanging off the rubber, so Remus could turn off his processor.

Whilst he worked, Sirius put on a film, and decided to work on his stretches in front of the sofa. It was wholly distracting for Remus, who wasn’t too fussed about his attention, really. He was amazed at just how flexible Sirius’ body was. He could bend and hold shapes that made Remus’ very bones ache, and he did so with such a casual air, like his body was made for it.

Just before the film ended—which was some barmy indie flick Remus couldn’t follow because Sirius hadn’t put the captions on and Remus hadn’t bothered to ask him to—Remus sent the email in to Gideon. He’d sorted both Sirius and Alice’s interviews with the proper context as though Remus had done a sit-down. He’d modified all the pronouns and replaced the gendered questions. When he hit send, he shut the laptop and leant onto his side, propping his head up on his fist.

With one hand, he switched back on his processor, and the room filled with noise again. “So, ballet.”

In the middle of a stretch which had him sat straight up, one leg out in front of him, the other pulled high up near his ear, Sirius turned his head. “All sorted?”

Remus nodded. “Now all I’ve got pressing is my paper all about you.”

Sirius preened a bit as he dropped his leg. Turning onto his stomach, he propped his chin up on both fists, his knees crooked up, ankles crossed in the air. “What about the ballet?”

“Well you wrote down you got started in dance doing ballet.”

Sirius nodded, the gesture awkward as his weight was resting on his fists. “Mum and dad wanted me cultured. So I was in ballet, took piano and cello, did a bit of singing—though I’ll only do it whilst pissed because I’m not actually any good at it.”

Remus smiled. “Did you like any of it?”

With a shrug, Sirius hopped up and slid back onto the sofa next to Remus. He laid down flat on his back, Remus still leant up over him a bit, and he grinned when Remus laid his hand flat on Sirius’ stomach. “I didn’t mind the ballet so much, except I spent so many hours in the studio, it got boring. I was good at it, though. One of the few who actually mastered dancing en pointe.”

“Can you still?” Remus asked, drawing his hand slow, down toward Sirius’ thigh.

Sirius gave a small shiver, his eyes going a bit dark. “Mmmhmm.”

“Perhaps you can show me some day?” Remus put a little more pressure on Sirius’ leg.

“I think that could…be arranged.” Sirius shifted a bit. “I want to kiss you. I also want to move this back to my bedroom if it’s er…not too fast.”

Remus licked his lips, then dipped his head low to press a kiss to the side of Sirius’ neck. “I think that would be very agreeable.”

Abandoning his laptop to the side of the sofa, Remus allowed himself to be drawn to his feet, and together the pair crept out of the lounge and back to Sirius’ room. Closing the door, Sirius brought his long fingers up into Remus’ hair, stopping for a second when they hit the implant.

“Shit. I’m sorry.”

Remus grinned, shaking his head. “No it’s fine. I don’t even really notice it. Though I’d prefer to take it off.”

Sirius nodded. “Yes, anything, of course.” He pulled Remus in for a lingering kiss. “Should we talk about you know…stuff. Boundaries, wants, whatever? Before you do?”

Remus hummed gently, pressing his lips along Sirius jaw. “Yes. Yes erm, do you have condoms?”

“I do,” Sirius breathed. “I also have a cock, and I prefer to bottom.”

“I can work with that,” Remus murmured, his lips not leaving the warm skin. “If there’s something I don’t like, I’ll tell you. And if you need my attention, just tap my shoulder.” Remus demonstrated, a sharp pat on Sirius’ shoulder with two fingers.

“Alright,” Sirius said. He paused to kiss Remus once more. Their hips slotted together, and Sirius let out a low moan. Remus splayed his fingers out along the top of Sirius’ chest. “Go on. I’ll wait.”

Remus grinned, carefully switching off the processor and his hearing aid. He removed the pieces, depositing everything onto Sirius’ nightstand. Everything went still and quiet, and all Remus knew was the dull thrum of anticipation and desire coursing through his veins.

He moved to cross back over to Sirius, but Sirius had already approached. With gentle hands, he touched the sides of Remus’ face, drawing him in for another kiss. This time they backed up, falling to the bed as Remus pulled Sirius down on top of him.

Straddling Remus’ legs, Sirius bent low, feathering kisses all along his jaw and neck. He would dart his grey eyes up from time to time, searching Remus’ face, ensuring this was all fine and good. Remus felt himself moan in the back of his throat, which spurred Sirius on further.

Before long, they began to wriggle out of clothes. Remus wasn’t often naked in front of people. He had never been overly enthusiastic about his body. A weak child, he had scars from various falls, and his poorly immune system meant he was peaky and under muscled.

But Sirius’ eyes went wide at the sight of him, his tongue darting across his lower lip like Remus looked good, _delicious_ , even. He made a face, and Remus’ hand immediately flew to Sirius’ chest to confirm it was a moan. Oh and it was. A loud one by how hard it vibrated against Remus’ fingertips.

He responded in kind as he shifted his hips up, pressing his hardness against Sirius. Sirius’ eyes went narrow, dark with lust, and hands began to wander. Before long, Sirius was on his side, pressing a bottle of lube into Remus’ hands. Remus coated his fingers as liberally as he could, then pulled Sirius flush against his chest so he could have access.

It wasn’t long before he was pressing a finger inside, then two. He could feel Sirius panting against his shoulder. And fuck, he wasn’t going to last long. It had been ages since he’d been with someone, and never had he wanted to be inside someone as much as he wanted Sirius. 

He was almost dizzy with it, and shaking a bit with nerves as he reversed their positions. He had the condom now, rolling it on and coating himself as Sirius spread his legs. His thighs gripped Remus’ hips a bit, trembling with need and his lips were curving over words Remus couldn’t decipher.

“Are you,” Remus asked, trying to control the timbre of his voice without being able to hear it, “are you speaking English?”

Sirius’ eyes opened, and his cheeks turned pink. ‘No,’ Remus saw his lips form. ‘Sorry.’

Remus’ head was shaking as he placed one hand lightly on Sirius’ chest, the other bracing himself on the mattress. “No it’s fine. Just…was nervous. Tell me if I get too loud, okay? I can’t…I forget sometimes.”

Sirius was smiling, then shifting his hips, urging him to slide in. The progression was slow, gentle for Remus’ fear he might hurt Sirius. Sirius was tight, and grunting with the effort to stay still, but Remus was determined to make it good. Eventually, though, he was fully sheathed. He had his hips pressed right up against the backs of Sirius’ thighs, and they were both staring at each other, pupils blown wide, mouths opened in gentle pants.

Then Remus moved, and Sirius’ mouth cracked wider. Remus felt the cry under his hand, and it spurred him on. His thrusts were a little harder, sharper, and Sirius was nodding, meeting him thrust for thrust, his lips curving into a delicious stream of begging and swearing.

Bowing his head, Remus grunted with need as he sped up, feeling his release just moments away, but he wanted to make sure Sirius came first. He regained a little sense, moving his hand back from Sirius’ throat to the weeping cock, and he began to stroke in time with his movements. Sirius’ head went back further, his shoulders arching, his insides quivering.

It took moments, really, before he was spilling between them, and it was all Remus needed to meet his own orgasm with closed eyes and a moan breaking free from his lips.

Sirius was the first to recover once Remus had regained the sense to roll over. With careful hands, Sirius removed the condom, tying it off and dropping it into the bin. He got up and darted out, still naked, for a warm, wet flannel to clean them off. He did his belly first, then Remus’ hands and hips, clearing up what was left of the sticky lube.

Remus fumbled for the nightstand, putting his processor back on, and when the room erupted into sound, all he heard was his own breath, and a very quiet sigh of contentment from Sirius.

“Well,” Remus said after a few moments, “I guess we threw dating propriety out the window.”

Sirius giggled, slipping beneath the duvet and making Remus wriggle upward until he was enveloped by the heavy blanket. “I’m alright with it.”

Remus hummed, dragging his hand down Sirius’ cheek. “Me too. But erm…I might leave this bit out of my paper.”

Sirius rolled his eyes, turning toward Remus. “But I was so good.”

“Narcissist,” Remus breathed, pulling Sirius close.

Sirius hummed and snuggled deeper into Remus’ arms. “Maybe, but I think I might like being with you almost as much as I like myself. So that’s saying something.”

“Indeed,” Remus said. “I’m going to turn off and sleep now.”

“Okay.”

As Remus switched off, Sirius turned flicked the lamp out, and in the silence of the night, they slept in each other’s arms. 

*** 

“He’ll be here, right?” Sirius fretted, looking through the small window at the ever-increasing crowd. “I mean, he’s told me big crowds make him nervous. But he said he’d be here. I don’t care if he turns his thingie off,” Sirius said, waving to the side of his head. “He doesn’t have to hear it. I just want him _here_.”

James let out a great sigh, yanking Sirius close. He pressed a kiss to the side of his mouth, avoiding the globs of pink-tinted gloss and therefore a massive screeching row because James had dared to compromise Sirius’ pre-competition makeup. “I know. You want your boyfriend here as support. And he said he’d be here. He might have got held up at work. Remus wouldn’t just forget to show up.”

Sirius shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. “Do I know that, though? Shit, James, I don’t even know him.”

James rolled his eyes. “So if he turns out to be a complete fucking twat like all the others, I’ll punch him in the face, snuggle you til you move on, and then we’ll forget he ever existed.”

“James!” Sirius screeched, giving James an open-handed smack on the shoulder. “You’re supposed to be all supportive and uplifting.” Sirius dropped his voice and mimicked James’ slight accent. “Don’t worry, Sirius. Your boyfriend would never do that to you. You have the best judge in character, Sirius. If I wasn’t obnoxiously into Lily I would marry you myself.”

James rolled his eyes. “Calm down, you ruddy drama-queen.” He moved past Sirius to look through the window, then his eyes widened. “Look, he’s just there. He’s sat next to Lily.” 

Sirius gave James a massive shove to the side, pressing his face to the window. He let out what some might call a near inhuman screech as he saw that not only was Remus sat there, but he was sporting a new haircut. An undercut, leaving the top floppy with his impossible curls. Sirius stepped back, pressing his hand to his mouth, unmindful of his gloss now. “Oh fuck me.”

James, worried, peered through the window again. “What? What’s happening?”

“His hair,” Sirius hissed. “Do you see that? His hair? It’s like fucking walking _sex_.”

“Oh Christ almighty, you scared me.” Rolling his eyes, James took Sirius by the shoulders. “Are you okay now? Can I go take my seat or do I need to stay back here?”

Sirius hesitated, then peered out the window again and this time his shriek was a little more dignified. “Fucking Reg is here!”

James quirked a brow, then saw at the very back was indeed, Sirius’ younger brother. James had got to know him a bit better once Sirius had sorted out their family issues. Regulus was a student at UCL, going into law just like James. Sirius didn’t see his brother often, so to have his support now, he knew, was huge.

“You want me to grab him?”

Sirius shook his head, taking a deep breath. Someone started music and he knew it was close to time. “I’ll see him after. Just…just make sure he doesn’t slip away, alright?”

James nodded. “Of course, love.”

“Give us a kiss,” Sirius demanded. “A proper one, I have to fix my fucking lips anyway.”

James laughed, then took Sirius by the face and planted a long, lingering kiss right on his strawberry-scented mouth. “There. For good luck and all that. Not that you need it. I’ll be right outside.”

James left, and Sirius turned to the group of cheerleaders who were all standing about looking decidedly nervous. Alice was giving her pep-talk, but Sirius wasn’t listening to it. He was busy replying the last few days in his head with Remus. 

Part of him wanted to know _how_ it happened. How had he gone for a run, then showed up to cheer to have his life turned upside down with a curly-haired, beanie-wearing, jumper-loving pile of floof that was Remus Lupin? How had he dropped his defences and let this total stranger into his heart and his head, and his bloody bed? And James kept looking at him like he sodding _knew_ where it was going to go—and he wasn’t afraid for Sirius like he had been all those other times.

Was it like that for him with Lily? In spite of her refusing to even look twice at James because he was a bit of a twat back then. But had he looked at Lily and just known? Maybe it was the way Sirius had always known they’d make it because he could see in Lily’s eyes she was cracking just under the surface. She was starting to see the bits under James’ bravado which held the most caring and wonderful man Sirius had _ever_ known, and above all, Lily deserved James.

So was that how it was?

Closing his eyes, Sirius thought about Remus’ mouth on his, just a sweet little kiss, and he broke out into a sweat.

At least until Alice shouted at him. “Sirius Black get your fucking head in the game. If you don’t land all of your moves I swear I will eviscerate you myself.”

Sirius snapped to attention, nodding. He joined the others in their circle and prepared for their win.

*** 

Remus was sat near the end of the row of chairs next to James, Lily on the other side of him. Pete was also there, looking a bit out of place, and near the end were Marlene and Dori who winked and waved. They hadn’t seen him much over the last few days, but they seemed rather happy about it. For him, though, rather than because of his absence.

Remus was disgustingly happy, was the problem. Loner Remus, who hated most people and couldn’t stand the world in general. Rude Remus who often came up with symphonies of insults for half the students in his lectures. He was bloody falling in love. After a week.

It was mad, really. But he couldn’t help it. He recalled his mum saying something about how when you knew it was right, you’d just _know_ but never in his life did he expect to understand so fully.

He’d been infatuated immediately before. Overcome with lust or attraction. But it wasn’t like this. It wasn’t this soul-deep desire to just be near someone else. And Sirius, my god, he was so consuming. Just the thought of his long, slender fingers touching Remus on the face was enough to send his head into a spin.

Before he could think too deeply, the music began to start, and Remus knew Sirius’ team was second to perform. He started to reach for his processor, his fingers grazing along his new haircut Dori insisted on doing because, “It’s going to look fucking hot on you, and Sirius will love it. Plus I cannot deal with looking at that mess on your head any longer.”

It showed his implant a bit more, but she hadn’t been wrong. It suited him. It wasn’t what he was used to, and he hadn’t time to show Sirius yet, but he looked forward to seeing his face after the competition.

Before he could switch off, there was movement on his side. He looked over and startled, for just a split second thinking Sirius had somehow changed out of his cheerleading kit and into a pair of black trousers and white button up shirt rolled at the sleeves, because the person next to him looked just like Sirius.

Except after a second he noticed the differences. This person’s nose was a bit more round, just enough to be different. His eyes were a little more narrow at the edges, and the colour was a deep brown. But he had the same cheekbones and jawline, and same mouth with the gentle, curving sneer. His hair was just as long, or close, and was tied back in an elegant knot at the back of his head.

Glancing over at Remus, he gave a nod, then one to James who was leaning over. “Reg,” James said. “Sirius said for me to physically prevent you from leaving before you say hi.”

_Brother_ , Remus’ memory supplied. This was Sirius brother.

“I figured as much. Saw him poking his face in the window. I thought I might drop by for tea after.”

James brightened. “He’ll be really excited.” James blinked, then cleared his throat. “Shit, sorry. Reg, this is Remus, Sirius’ er… Boyfriend, is it?”

Remus felt his cheeks heat up, but he nodded. “Yeah. Hello.” He extended a hand.

Reg’s eyes flickered to the implant, like everyone’s did, but like Sirius, he looked away immediately. “Pleasure.” His hands were also similar, and Remus had to wonder in spite of what sounded like an epic rubbish bin for a family they were, how they managed to win the genetic lottery. He then wondered if the rest of his family were so good looking.

There wasn’t a lot of time to play get-to-know-you. The host for the evening took the mic, and the music ramped up. Remus took the opportunity to turn everything off, and his world settled into a silence. He could feel it thrumming under his feet, but he didn’t care much for what the host had to say. It would be at least seven minutes before Sirius went on.

He instead went back to finishing his paper on Sirius. Remus had shadowed him for most of the day, which was—he realised—a poor excuse to cover up a date. Though he took extensive notes, and eventually wrote his paper in a rather unique style of daily log. But it was the only way to encompass what Remus learnt about his new lover.

Most of it was no different from his own day. Sirius slept, woke up, ate meals, went to the shops, sat in lectures. But Remus noticed a distinct way he carried himself, like he wanted to be noticed, but with some tension because he knew that at some point, someone would be a twat. Someone would make an assumption, or they would say something. Someone would be ignorant or cruel.

It wasn’t every second of every day, but it was enough no matter where he went. Rude comments heard queueing whilst buying apples. Second and third glances, and whispers behind hands whilst queueing at the bank. The flustered assumptions of customer service people or servers because they weren’t sure and they didn’t know how to just ask.

Remus had noted every flinch every time Sirius was referred to as, “Sir”, or “Mr”, or “lads”. When at dinner the server said, “What would you gentlemen prefer to drink?” And when Sirius didn’t correct him, Remus asked why.

“Because I’m tired,” Sirius said. “Sometimes I have the energy to tell people, and other times it’s been in every sodding place I go and by the time I sit down to my meal, I have to weigh whether or not the row and threat to my food is worth it over a gender assumption.”

Remus’ heart broke a little bit. But he knew where he was going with his paper. He had let Sirius read it as well, that morning. Sirius hadn’t said much, but kissed him hard on the mouth and held him tight and whispered, “Fucking lovely, you are.”

Remus had wanted to say, “I shouldn’t be considered fucking lovely for basic human decency. For doing the bare minimum. For bothering—like everyone should—to just respect a person’s fucking identity.” But instead he’d just kissed him back and whispered, “So are you.”

Because that was also true. Sirius was fucking wonderful. He lived up to his namesake. A bright, encompassing star who glowed just under the surface of his skin and Remus knew that he was so far deep in, there was no way out. Even if Sirius decided he was shot of Remus tomorrow, Remus would pine for him forever.

His internal monologue was interrupted by the arrival of the first cheer team. They were peppy, lively, but not as organised as Sirius’ team was, and everyone in the crowd seemed to know it. Clearly they were not favoured. Remus didn’t catch the name, but he didn’t care. Sirius and his team were up next.

After a reset, the music began humming again, and the KCL Hippogriffs rushed out. Their kits were maroon and gold with white trim, and it was very flattering on them. Tight skirts, long sleeves. Sirius looked particularly good in his, and Remus tried to breathe through it. The last thing he needed was to be overly turned on before they even got back to the flat.

Instead he distracted himself by watching everyone move. He wasn’t sure of the song, only the rhythmic beat under his toes, and he found himself captivated by the fluidity of their movements. Glancing over, he saw James on the edge of his seat, hands clasped between his knees, and he looked nervous, but a bit delighted.

The song wasn’t overly long, just enough to show off impressive flips and several tosses which were all landed perfectly. Remus watched Sirius tumble and stretch, contort into fantastic shapes. He was loud, excited, his smile beaming through the crowd. Several times he caught Remus’ eye and winked, making Remus blush.

Then it was over and everyone was cheering. Remus could feel it all the way in his chest even as he stood, clapping and shouting along with James, Lily, and even Regulus who seemed subdued about the entire affair.

There were six more teams after, before any of them could rush off to meet Sirius. Then the winners were announced and it was no surprise to see the host’s lips curve round, “KCL HIPPOGRIFFS!”

The entire crowd went wild as the team appeared, taking their trophy and winnings. Alice was near-sobbing as she hugged her team, and they were all jumping. In Remus’ opinion, it was a shoe-in, but he hadn’t realised he was nervous for a loss until it was over.

Luckily as the crowd began to disperse, James had Remus by the hand, was taking him and Regulus behind the doors where Sirius was waiting.

Remus assumed Sirius would be immediately interested in seeing his brother, but instead he was yanked into a fierce hug, a kiss pressed to his lips. He came away a little sticky from the gloss, and realised Sirius was speaking, but he hadn’t turned on his processor yet.

“Hang on,” Remus said, and fumbled for it. After a second, the world erupted into loud noise and he winced, then smiled. “Hey.”

Sirius cupped his face, darting a glance at his waiting brother, then kissed Remus again. “Hey.” He dragged his hand round the back of Remus’ head, his fingertips brushing along the short clipped hair. “What the fuck is this?”

Remus blushed. “Dori erm…sort of insisted.”

Tipping his head in toward Remus’ ear he said, “It’s so fucking hot, I’m having trouble controlling my desire to just pounce you right here.”

Remus gulped, then said, “Your brother is watching.”

Sirius laughed, dragging his open mouth along Remus’ jaw before he turned his boyfriend over, slinging an arm round his neck. “Regulus, you lil’ shit. What are you doing here?”

“You invited me,” Regulus said with a sniff. He lifted an eyebrow at the pair, then said, “If I’d known it was going to be gratuitous displays of public affection, I might have not bothered.”

“Some day you’ll crack dear old mummy’s social conditioning. Are you coming back to ours?”

“Depends. Are you throwing some ridiculous party to celebrate your win like a bunch of commoners?”

Sirius grinned widely. “No. But we could if you’re desperate for it.”

“Fuck off. I told James I’d come for tea.”

Sirius was all-but bouncing on his toes. “See you there, arse-face.” With that, he turned to give James a swift kiss, then dragged Remus off with a shouted, “Meet you. Need to have a snog against the wall.”

Apparently, Remus discovered as they got out near Sirius’ bike, his lover was not joking. He was shoved against the bricks and snogged until he couldn’t breathe. Thin fingers drew lines up and down his ribs, under his jumper, holding him tight.

“So,” Sirius breathed, pressing his nose to Remus’ cheek, “the last time you were here, you met me for the first time. Any regrets.”

Remus smiled very softly as he cupped Sirius cheek. “None. At all. I’m…” He swallowed, then let out a breath and said, “I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you. So…I don’t think I could ever regret that. Even if you rip my heart out right now, and stomp all over it.”

Sirius seemed stunned into silence, then a sort of sheen glazed over his eyes as he stepped even closer. “How do you do that to me? How?”

Remus swallowed thickly. “I erm…don’t know.”

But Sirius was smiling now, kissing Remus again hard and desperate. “I think I’m falling in love with you too, git. So…so let’s go home, yeah? And be fucking disgusting together. Give James and Lily something to envy.” His hand ghosted down Remus’ arm, twisting their fingers together in a tight, needy grip.

Remus looked at those grey eyes for a long moment, then nodded. “Yeah. I think we should.”

Sirius grinned.


End file.
